Captainsparklez

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Eoin Colfer
“Grab some caviar from the kitchen. You wouldn't believe the muck they feed us in Bartleby's for ten thousand a term.”
Eoin Colfer, The Arctic Incident

Eoin Colfer
“I'm LEP. A captain. No rent-a-cop gnome is going to stand in the way of my orders.”
Eoin Colfer, The Arctic Incident

Eoin Colfer
“I'm not threatening you. I'm just informing you of police procedure. If you continue to obstruct me, I remove the obstruction, in this case you, and proceed to the next command.”
Eoin Colfer, The Arctic Incident

Eoin Colfer
“I'm the crazy girly captain, Remember?”
Eoin Colfer, The Arctic Incident

Eoin Colfer
“(text message) CMDR ROOT. TRBLE BELOW. HAVN OVRRN BY GOBLINS. PLCE PLAZA SRROUNDED. CUDGEON + OPL KBOI BHND PLOT. NO WPONS OR CMMUNICATIONS. DNA CNONS CNTRLLED BY KBOI. I M TRPPED IN OP BTH. CNCL THNKS IM 2 BLM. IF ALIVE PLSE HLP. IF NOT, WRNG NMBR.”
Eoin Colfer, The Arctic Incident

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