“I am a sick man... I am a spiteful man. I am an unpleasant man. I think my liver is diseased. However, I don't know beans about my disease, and I am not sure what is bothering me. I don't treat it and never have, though I respect medicine and doctors. Besides, I am extremely superstitious, let's say sufficiently so to respect medicine. (I am educated enough not to be superstitious, but I am.) No, I refuse to treat it out of spite. You probably will not understand that. Well, but I understand it. Of course I can't explain to you just whom I am annoying in this case by my spite. I am perfectly well aware that I cannot "get even" with the doctors by not consulting them. I know better than anyone that I thereby injure only myself and no one else. But still, if I don't treat it, its is out of spite. My liver is bad, well then-- let it get even worse!”
― Notes from Underground, White Nights, The Dream of a Ridiculous Man, and Selections from The House of the Dead
― Notes from Underground, White Nights, The Dream of a Ridiculous Man, and Selections from The House of the Dead
“Perhaps I really regard myself as an intelligent man only because throughout my entire life I've never been able to start or finish anything.”
― Notes from Underground, White Nights, The Dream of a Ridiculous Man, and Selections from The House of the Dead
― Notes from Underground, White Nights, The Dream of a Ridiculous Man, and Selections from The House of the Dead
“I could not become anything; neither good nor bad; neither a scoundrel nor an honest man; neither a hero nor an insect. And now I am eking out my days in my corner, taunting myself with the bitter and entirely useless consolation that an intelligent man cannot seriously become anything, that only a fool can become something.”
― Notes from Underground, White Nights, The Dream of a Ridiculous Man, and Selections from The House of the Dead
― Notes from Underground, White Nights, The Dream of a Ridiculous Man, and Selections from The House of the Dead
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