Michael Bisping

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J.K. Rowling
“If you want to know what a man's like, take a good look at how he treats his inferiors, not his equals.”
J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire

George Carlin
“That's why they call it the American Dream, because you have to be asleep to believe it.”
George Carlin

J.K. Rowling
“Don’t put your wand there, boy!” roared Moody. “What if it ignited? Better wizards than you have lost buttocks, you know!” “Who d’you know who’s lost a buttock?” the violet-haired woman asked Mad-Eye interestedly. “Never you mind, you just keep your wand out of your back pocket!” growled Mad-Eye. “Elementary wand safety, nobody bothers about it anymore . . .” He stumped off toward the kitchen. “And I saw that,” he added irritably, as the woman rolled her eyes at the ceiling.”
J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix

Jerry Seinfeld
“If a book about failures doesn't sell, is it a success?”
Jerry Seinfeld

Rick Riordan
“She said this in the same way you might say Fields of Punishment or Hades's gym shorts.”
Rick Riordan, The Titan's Curse

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