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Roselyn Tomasulo

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“What we all share in common - the real reason for this book - is a desire to love better. To love ourselves in the midst of great pain, and to love another when the pain of this life grows too large for one person to hold. This book offers the skills needed to make that kind of love a reality.”
― Megan Devine, It's OK That You're Not OK

tags: anger, care-taking, grief, hope, love, pain, resilience, shame, support, vulnerability

17 likes

“Every loss is valid. And every loss is not the same. You can't flatten the landscape of grief and say that everything is equal. It isn't.”
― Megan Devine, It's OK That You're Not OK

tags: authenticity, candor, care-taking, grief, hope, love, pain, resilience, shame, support

17 likes

“We have to start telling the truth about this kind of pain-grief , loss, love .”
― Megan Devine

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“The reality of grief is far different from what others see from the outside. There is pain in this world that you can't be cheered out of. You don't need solutions. You don't need to move on from your grief. You need someone to see your grief, to acknowledge it. You need someone to hold your hands while you stand there in blinking horror, staring at the hole that was your life. Some things cannot be fixed. They can only be carried.”
― Megan Devine, It's OK That You're Not OK

tags: authenticity, candor, care-taking, grief, hope, love, pain, resilience, shame, support

94 likes

“We need to talk about the hierarchy of grief. You hear it all the time—no grief is worse than any other. I don’t think that’s one bit true. There is a hierarchy of grief. Divorce is not the same as the death of a partner. Death of a grandparent is not
the same as the death of a child. Losing your job is not the same as losing a limb.

Here’s the thing: every loss is valid. And every loss is not the same. You can’t flatten the landscape of grief and say that
everything is equal. It isn’t.

It’s easier to see when we take it out of the intensely personal: stubbing your toe hurts. It totally hurts. For a moment, the pain can be all-consuming. You might even hobble for a while. Having your foot ripped off by a passing
freight train hurts, too. Differently. The pain lasts longer. The injury needs recovery time, which may be uncertain or complicated. It affects and impacts your life moving forward. You can’t go back to the life you had before you became a
one-footed person. No one would say these two injuries are exactly the same.”
― Megan Devine, It's OK That You're Not OK