Xigen Zhang

“Genuine feelings cannot be produced, nor can they be eradicated.”
― Alice Miller, The Body Never Lies: The Lingering Effects of Hurtful Parenting

“One reason big feelings can be so uncomfortable for small children is that they don’t view those emotions as temporary.”
― Daniel J. Siegel, The Whole-Brain Child: 12 Revolutionary Strategies to Nurture Your Child's Developing Mind

“The true opposite of depression is neither gaiety nor absence of pain, but vitality—the freedom to experience spontaneous feelings. It is part of the kaleidoscope of life that these feelings are not only happy, beautiful, or good but can reflect the entire range of human experience, including envy, jealousy, rage, disgust, greed, despair, and grief. But this freedom cannot be achieved if its childhood roots are cut off. Our access to the true self is possible only when we no longer have to be afraid of the intense emotional world of early childhood. Once we have experienced and become familiar with this world, it is no longer strange and threatening.”
― Alice Miller, The Drama of the Gifted Child: The Search for the True Self

“Loss of someone we love cannot be adequately expressed with words. Grappling with loss, struggling with disconnection and despair, fills us with a sense of anguish and actual pain. Indeed, the parts of our brain that process physical pain overlap with the neural centers that record social ruptures and rejection. Loss rips us apart.”
― Daniel J. Siegel, Mindsight: The New Science of Personal Transformation