Troy

“left her to work, grabbed a book that Holly had lent me, and tried to get past the second chapter. It was about vampires and werewolves and the love of a good woman. Apparently it had a lot of fans. I wasn’t amongst them. About thirty pages in and I’d already come to the conclusion that it was shit, but I figured it could only get better.”
― Steve McHugh, Crimes Against Magic

“The memory of being shot by a woman pretty much kills any sexual urge you have toward her. And if it doesn't, you have issues.”
― Steve McHugh, Crimes Against Magic

“Words actually failed me. I felt as dumb as my lounge-less friend in the corner. "You injected me with vampire blood?" My words were said slowly, ensuring that I didn't get one wrong or accidentally call Francis a fucking asshat. "You're a vampire?"
Francis' expression managed to convey how stupid he thought that question was. "I live underground, and you've never seen me outside. I'm pale in complexion ands obviously hundreds of years old. What did you think I was? Agoraphobic?”
― Steve McHugh, Crimes Against Magic