Tracy Thomas

“I've begun worshipping the sun for a number of reasons. First of all, unlike some other gods I could mention, I can see the sun. It's there for me every day. And the things it brings me are quite apparent all the time: heat, light, food, and a lovely day. There's no mystery, no one asks for money, I don't have to dress up, and there's no boring pageantry. And interestingly enough, I have found that the prayers I offer to the sun and the prayers I formerly offered to 'God' are all answered at about the same 50% rate.”
― George Carlin, Brain Droppings

“I don't have to tell you it goes without saying there are some things better left unsaid. I think that speaks for itself. The less said about it the better.”
― George Carlin, Brain Droppings

“THINGS YOU NEVER HEAR: 'Please stop sucking my dick or I'll call the police.”
― George Carlin, Brain Droppings

“Once you leave out all the bullshit they teach you in school, life gets really simple.”
― George Carlin, Brain Droppings