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Karen Doyle

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“My friends scoffed at my anxiety and said dumb things like, 'Fifty is the new forty!' Which just made me realize that there are a whole lot of other people who suck at math as bad as I do. No. Fifty is fifty.”
― Celia Rivenbark, You Can't Drink All Day If You Don't Start in the Morning

tags: aging, humor

16 likes

“I'd sooner wear white shoes in February, drink unsweetened tea, and eat Miracle Whip instead of Duke's than utter the words 'you guys'.”
― Celia Rivenbark, Bless Your Heart, Tramp: And Other Southern Endearments

tags: humor, southern, y-all

62 likes

“Never marry something until you've established the perfect pizza ratio...The premise is simple. My husband and I knew we were made for each other because we're a 6:2 ratio, six slices for him and two for me...Never marry a man who wants two slices one week and four the next. They're undependable and highly unpredictable and will likely dump you for some Internet honey who says she doesn't mind his back hair.”
― Celia Rivenbark, Bless Your Heart, Tramp: And Other Southern Endearments

tags: humor, marriage

35 likes