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Laurell K. Hamilton
“Never trust people who smile constantly. They're either selling something or not very bright.”
Laurell K. Hamilton, Burnt Offerings

Randy Pausch
“No matter how bad things are, you can always make things worse.”
Randy Pausch, The Last Lecture

Will Rogers
“Too many people spend money they haven't earned, to buy things they don't want, to impress people that they don't like.”
Will Rogers

Steven Wright
“I spilled spot remover on my dog; now he's gone.”
Steven Wright

Jackie Kessler
“And oil's not supposed to mix with water. But then someone invented mayonnaise, and wham - instant mixing.”
Jackie Kessler, Hell's Belles
tags: funny

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