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“Whenever I feel the need to exercise, I lie down until it goes away.”
Paul Terry

Nicholas Sparks
“Mom says it's because she has PMS.
Do you even know what that means?
"I'm not a little kid anymore. It means pissed-at- men syndrome”
Nicholas Sparks, The Last Song

Mark Twain
“I did not attend his funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.”
Mark Twain

Bill Watterson
“Reality continues to ruin my life.”
Bill Watterson, The Complete Calvin and Hobbes

Terry Pratchett
“Some humans would do anything to see if it was possible to do it. If you put a large switch in some cave somewhere, with a sign on it saying 'End-of-the-World Switch. PLEASE DO NOT TOUCH', the paint wouldn't even have time to dry.”
Terry Pratchett, Thief of Time

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