0 ratings (0.0 avg)
0 reviews

Kolton

Add friend

Kolton’s Bookshelves

to-read‎ (1)

currently-reading‎ (0)

read‎ (0)

Stats | More…

Kolton’s Quotes

“So Achmed if you've been in my suitcase this entire time how have you been getting through security? Oh thats easy they open the suitcase and i say 'ello my name is lindey lohan!”
― Jeff Dunham

56 likes

“Silence! I kill you!”
― Jeff Dunham

62 likes

“Achmed the Dead Terrorist: Knock, knock.
Jeff Dunham: Who's there?
Achmed the Dead Terrorist: Me, I kill you!”
― Jeff Dunham

52 likes

“Jeff: The drive from the valley?
Peanut: Was bad as hell!
Jeff: Traffic?
Peanut: Sucked like hell!
Jeff: Drivers?
Peanut: Angry as hell!
Jeff: And you?
Peanut: Were scared as hell!
Jeff: Parking?
Peanut: Sucked more like hell!
Jeff: So?
Peanut: We're in hell! ”
― Jeff Dunham

59 likes

“Jeff: I understand you guys had a good day today?
Peanut: Yes we had a great day!
Jose: No we did not.
Peanut: Yes
Jose: No
Peanut: Yes
Jose: No
Peanut: Yes
Jose: No we did not have a good day.
Peanut: Yes we hhhaad...a great frickin' day!
What?
Jeff: Did you have a good day?
Peanut: Yes
Jose: No
Peanut: Shut up
Jeff: A good day?
Peanut: Yes
Jose: No
Peanut: Shut up
Jeff: You're supposed to have taken him to the spa.
Peanut: I took him to the spa!
Jose: He put me in the vegetable steamer.
Peanut: It's the same thing!!!”
― Jeff Dunham

tags: comedian, humor, jeff-dunham, jose-jalapeno-on-a-stick, peanut

46 likes

More of Kolton’s quotes…