Mark Lister

“Sorry, old girl," I said to [my bicycle] Gladys in the gray dishwater light of early morning, "but I have to leave you at home."

I could see that she was disappointed, even though she managed to put on a brave face.

"I need you to stay here as a decoy," I whispered. "When they see you leaning against the greenhouse, they'll think I'm still in bed."

Gladys brightened considerably at the thought of a conspiracy. [...]

At the corner of the garden, I turned, and mouthed the words, "Don't do anything I wouldn't do," and Gladys signaled that she wouldn't.

I was off like a shot.”
― Alan Bradley, A Red Herring Without Mustard

“You can pray in the churchyard," the sergeant said. "The Lord has large ears.”
― Alan Bradley, Speaking from Among the Bones

“What are we going to do, Dogger?'
It seemed a reasonable question. After all he had been through, surely Dogger knew something of hopeless situations.
'We shall wait upon tomorrow,' he said.
'But--what if tomorrow is worse than today?'
'Then we shall wait upon the day after tomorrow.'
'And so forth?' I asked.
'And so forth,' Dogger said.”
― Alan Bradley, The Dead in Their Vaulted Arches

“I was the eighth dwarf. Sneaky.”
― Alan Bradley, Speaking from Among the Bones