Wesley Turner

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Jarod Kintz
“Stir a smile in your coffee, and see if that brings out your inner unicorn. Then fry up a few rainbows. I like mine with extra blue and green.”
Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not for Sale

Jarod Kintz
“My new snackable deliciousness is called Ears In A Box. Listen up, I think people will love it. Should the logo be Helen Keller or van Gogh?”
Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not for Sale

Jarod Kintz
“So @Mizzou has a student shortage problem, but they haven't called me to try to fill demand. I have one student in stock, and I am ON SALE.”
Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not for Sale

Jarod Kintz
“I know you want some of my Wow Bang Fuzz Pop. On sale NOW! Buy four and get the third FREE! Also try my Flash Bang Wow Soda—now in both Diet and Extra Diabetes.”
Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not for Sale

Jarod Kintz
“Some baby shampoos say “No More Tears” on the bottle. What a scam. I want my shampoo made with 100% real baby tears.”
Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not for Sale

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