Lucy

“But even if they could go home it would be difficult for me to tell you what the moral of the story is. In some stories, it's easy. The moral of 'The Three Bears', for instance, is "Never break into someone else's house". The moral of 'Snow White' is "Never eat apples". The moral of World War One is "Never assassinate Archduke Ferdinand.”
― Lemony Snicket, The Wide Window

“Let me advise you, my dear young friend-- nay, let me warn you with all seriousness, that should you leave these rooms you will not by any chance go to sleep in any other part of the castle. It is old, and has many memories, and there are bad dreams for those who sleep unwisely.”
― Bram Stoker, Dracula

“Where shall I begin, please your Majesty?" he asked.
"Begin at the beginning," the King said gravely, "and go on till you come to the end: then stop.”
― Lewis Carroll, Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland / Through the Looking-Glass

“In other news, a recent report suggests that things may not be as they seem.”
― Joseph Fink, Welcome to Night Vale