Eric Cullen

“Long after I left the segment, the term “fake news” became the ordinary way to describe what was done on SNL as well as The Daily Show and The Colbert Report. So who’s the idiot now?”
― Norm Macdonald, Based on a True Story

“The plain truth is that Adam Eget is an alcoholic and that’s why he doesn’t drink. Me, I’m not an alcoholic and that’s why I do drink. Life sure is funny that way.”
― Norm Macdonald, Based on a True Story

“Sometimes a writer's strike is good. Maybe if we had a writer's strike now, people would have to read Shakespeare instead of James Patterson.”
― Norm Macdonald

“I could not ignore their withering glances. They looked at me the way real vampires look at Count Chocula.”
― Norm Macdonald, Based on a True Story