Zuhashakeel

“I have noticed that this hell we are in is purifying and refining the edges of my mind and heart. And then it made me think: what if that's what hell really is? What if everyone who goes to hell, goes there to come out purified and refined? What if it's just a stopover? What if nobody is ever really left there? What if everything, at one point, becomes, or is, utterly holy? (Don't chastise me for my thoughts, for I am never afraid to think.)”
― C. JoyBell C.

“I feel that quarantine has brought me closer to other people, to everyone. Like, we are all finally on the same page now. I have spent my life attending to, and cultivating, my inner world. Moving outwards from what is within my heart and within the deepest recesses of my mind. "From-in-to-out" has always been my mode of living. I have always looked at everyone else and thought that they fill their hearts and their minds with static noise, so much noise. They feel things, but then they can just go and drown all of that in work immersion; they have pressing issues on their minds, but they can just go and drown the sounds of their own thoughts in a one-night-stand; they have wounds on their spirits, but they can evade feeling those wounds and healing them, by blowing themselves into larger-than-life projections in the workplace, at school, on social media. So much noise, just so much noise. I feel as though, all my life, I have been screaming at the world, begging people to go inward, to face their angels and their demons, to know themselves. Now in quarantine, I think everyone is forced to do exactly that. The world is forced into a quietness that should of happened long ago, every day, all the time. A quietness of retreating into the knowledge of, and the acquaintance with, the mind, the heart. I feel that now, at long last, everybody else is on the same page as myself. Being alone in quarantine is not mentally or emotionally or spiritually difficult for me. This is because I know the person I am with, I know me. And I like her.”
― C. JoyBell C.

“There is ALWAYS going to be a way out, or in, or around... you need to train your brain to know and to believe that. Because when you do, you're not going to stop until you find that way. Some people think about fate. I'm not like that. I'm not like, "this is my fate." Instead, I say, "this life is my gift and I have my tools with me and there is ALWAYS going to be a way.”
― C. JoyBell C.

“The way I see myself, is like I'm this Martian flower. A flower on Mars, doing my own thing; this is my own planet, don't get too near me. And maybe an astronaut will come around one day, and say, "Hey, this is a cool planet, that's a cool flower, maybe I can stay here." You know? So far, the astronauts that visit, say, "Hey this is a cool planet and that's a cool flower, I wonder what happens if I pick this flower, bring it home and teach it how to grow in my backyard soil." I'm a Martian flower. I have my own planet, my own soil, I don't need to be anything other. It's a pretty great planet, but you have to have Mars in your heart to stay here. You need to turn Martian. Martian flowers don't grow in your backyard.”
― C. JoyBell C.