Shannon

“This is your captain speaking. Welcome aboard flight...one, from...here to there. We'll be cruising at a height of ten feet, going up to twelve and a half feet if we see anything big. And our copilot today is a flask of coffee.”
― Eddie Izzard

“Father, bless me for I have sinned, I did an original sin… I poked a badger with a spoon.”
― Eddie Izzard

“Cake or death?”
― Eddie Izzard

“They say that 'Guns don't kill people, people kill people.' Well I think the gun helps. If you just stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill too many people.”
― Eddie Izzard