Tsippora

“I don't know how to be a friend. I don't know how to be anything.”
― Gayle Forman, Just One Day

“Maybe making friends is a specific skill, and I missed the lesson.”
― Gayle Forman, Just One Day

“I’ve never had a really close friend, and I’m unclear how you make one”
― Gayle Forman, Just One Day

“Exhibit D: The Cots
(or, If You Give a Librarian a Closet)

If you give a librarian a closet, she will probably fill it with junk.

If she fills it with junk, some of the junk will be books in need of repair.

If some of the junk is books, and the closet is off of a back room anyway, she will hide more books there, books that she thinks are crap like the Stormy Sisters series, but which her boss thinks the library should keep.

If she hides crappy books there, she will be in no rush to clean the closet, since she would then be out a hiding place.

If she goes ten months without cleaning it, she will go to great lengths to hide the mess from her alcoholic and temperamental boss.

If she wants to hide the mess from her boss, she will stuff the front of the closet with cots that were once used for nap hour of the short-lived library day care, circa 1996.

If she stuffs the closet with cots… the closet will fester unopened for months.

If the closet festers unopened for months, the librarian will probably decorate the closet door with cartoons and posters in an effort to distract her fellow librarians from the thought of ever opening the closet.

If a librarian decorates a closet door, she will use such items as a Conan the Librarian cartoon, a large stocker that says “the world is quiet here,” a poster of If You Give a Mouse a Cookie, a CPR chart, and a bookstore café napkin signed by Michael Chabon.

If she uses these items, her boss will ask, “What the hell does this mean, ‘The world is quiet here’? Is it political?” And her boss will also ask, “you’re not filing Michael Chabon in the children’s section, are you?” but her boss, distracted by these items, will never think to open the door.

If her boss never opens the door, she will forget she has given the librarian a closet and will, by the end of the year, offer the librarian a second closet.

If she gives the librarian a second closet, the librarian will probably fill it with junk.”
― Rebecca Makkai, The Borrower