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Steven Wright
“If at first you don't succeed then skydiving definitely isn't for you.”
Steven Wright

Cathy Guisewite
“When life gives you lemons, squirt someone in the eye.”
Cathy Guiswite

John  Green
“What the hell is that?" I laughed.
"It's my fox hat."
"Your fox hat?"
"Yeah, Pudge. My fox hat."
"Why are you wearing your fox hat?" I asked.
"Because no one can catch the motherfucking fox.”
John Green, Looking for Alaska

Oscar Wilde
“Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.”
Oscar Wilde

Jerry Lewis
“I've had great success being a total idiot. ”
Jerry Lewis

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