John

“I installed a skylight in my apartment...The people who live above me are
furious!”
― Steven Wright

“My dental hygienist is cute. Every time I visit, I eat a whole package of Oreo cookies while waiting in the lobby. Sometimes she has to cancel the rest of the afternoon's appointments.”
― Steven Wright

“I got food poisoning today. I don't know when I'll use it.”
― Steven Wright

“If a word in the dictionary were mispelled, how would we know?”
― Steven Wright