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“Only those who put more energy into self-pity than into paying attention are truly marooned.”
― The Three Marriages: Reimagining Work, Self and Relationship
― The Three Marriages: Reimagining Work, Self and Relationship
“Therefore, at any time of life, follow your own questions; don’t mistake other people’s questions for your own.”
― The Three Marriages: Reimagining Work, Self and Relationship
― The Three Marriages: Reimagining Work, Self and Relationship
“We can never know in the beginning, in giving ourselves to a person, to a work, to a marriage or to a cause, exactly what kind of love we are involved with. When we demand a certain specific kind of reciprocation before the revelation has flowered completely we find ourselves disappointed and bereaved and in that grief may miss the particular form of love that is actually possible but that did not meet our initial and too specific expectations. Feeling bereft we take our identity as one who is disappointed in love, our almost proud disappointment preventing us from seeing the lack of reciprocation from the person or the situation as simply a difficult invitation into a deeper and as yet unrecognizable form of affection.”
― Consolations - Revised edition: The Solace, Nourishment and Underlying Meaning of Everyday Words
― Consolations - Revised edition: The Solace, Nourishment and Underlying Meaning of Everyday Words
“Jane Austen never did marry. Why doesthat statement call for such reflexive pity? It carries a diferent meaning if we follow it up: Jane Austen never did marry, and therefore she was given the time and perspective to produce books as well-written as those by anyone who ever lived."
-David Whyte”
― The Three Marriages: Reimagining Work, Self and Relationship
-David Whyte”
― The Three Marriages: Reimagining Work, Self and Relationship
“The interesting dynamic about human happiness in the marriage to work is that we can glide down the road in the metaphorical Jaguar XK 150, having a completely miserable, blazing argument with our partner while the wind is blowing unheeded through our hair. I can also find myself in the aptly name Ford Focus, laughing my way into a marvelous excursion. But neither Ford Focus nor Jaguar can guarantee us a place in the kingdom of happiness. It is the one in the driver's set, setting the destination and the attitude for the journey of work and vocation, who seems to make up our real possibilities for satisfaction over time.
The difficult truth is that our kingdom does not have to be very big at all in order for us to do good work: what is difficult is simply starting the work and carrying on with it day after day. My work space can be a small corner of a table on a train or if we are really, really focused, a knee on which to balance a writing pad.”
― The Three Marriages: Reimagining Work, Self and Relationship
The difficult truth is that our kingdom does not have to be very big at all in order for us to do good work: what is difficult is simply starting the work and carrying on with it day after day. My work space can be a small corner of a table on a train or if we are really, really focused, a knee on which to balance a writing pad.”
― The Three Marriages: Reimagining Work, Self and Relationship
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