Air Odd > Recent Status Updates

“These thoughtful kids have significant fears, so they often appear to be more serious than they are. They have to be invited to be playful, and even then it feels a bit frivolous and awkward. Deep down, they are tender and compassionate and would like to be more open with their love and affection, but the vulnerability they feel is too much to navigate.”

- Page 178

“They are comfortable spending time alone so they would be content with just one or two friends, but they aren’t adept at sharing feelings, and their need for personal space is difficult for other kids to understand.”

- Page 177

“These kids have mixed feelings about school. They are smart and enjoy learning, and they usually make good grades. However, the social demands of school are hard to read and a challenge to accommodate. It feels to them like people either want too much time with them or not enough.”

- Page 177

“For them [Fives] life is like a knowledge salad bar. They get in line, pick what they want, then bag it up, take it home, eat it and over the next week digest it. They need extended periods of time alone where they can process their thoughts and feelings.”

- Page 176

“To maintain their privacy, Fives tell each group of friends or colleagues one part of their story, but they never tell any group their whole story. They won’t tell you about every activity they’re involved in or introduce you to the friends they’ve made in their different spheres.”

- Page 175

“As a Five, he can sort through the facts, study the situation from every angle and then present me with a well-reasoned, unbiased case for why he thinks I should choose a particular course of action, even if it’s not what I want to hear or might somehow negatively affect his life.”

- Page 173

“In the end avarice catches up to Fives. They hoard too much, emotionally speaking. Their greed for privacy and their fear of self-disclosure lead to isolation.”

- Page 172

“Every handshake, phone call, business meeting, social gathering or unexpected encounter seems to cost them more than it does other people.”

- Page 170

“Fascinated to know about other people’s lives and a great listener, Bill always found a way to shift the focus of conversation back to me whenever I asked him about his own life.
At the time I wasn’t familiar with the Enneagram and didn’t know that withholding personal information is a classic trait of Fives.”

- Page 170

“When the past calls, let it go to voicemail. It has nothing new to say to you.”

[Fours]

- Page 166

“The search for authenticity means everything to Fours, and they can spot a poseur from a mile away.”

- Page 157


I’m starting to think my sister is a Four

“Do you see the problem? If the identity of the Four is hitched to their feelings, then it’s always changing. Their sense of self never stabilized.”

- Page 156

“As you can imagine, Fours wrestle with dissatisfaction. They always want the unavailable. What they have is never what they really want, and what they want is always somewhere ‘out there’ just beyond their reach. If only they knew that what they want is insides them.”

- Page 155

“Fours are the most complex of all the types on the Enneagram; what you see is never what you get. There are always more layers of things going on underneath the surface. Their waters run deep.”

- Page 155

“Envy has to do with desiring a characteristic others possess, while jealousy occurs when we feel like something we already possess is at risk of being taken away from us.”

- Page 153

“Out of true. That’s how a Four feels.
Fours believe they alone have this tragic flaw, so when they compare themselves to others (which is all the time), they feel inferior.”

- Page 152

“But they [Threes] all believe the same lie: you’re only as loved as your last success.”

- Page 142


*cough* Abby Lee (again) *cough*

Sound familiar?
“You’re only as good as your last performance.”

“This is one reason Suzanne and I love the Enneagram. Doesn’t knowing the worldview and motivation that drives a Three’s personality help awaken in our hearts some compassion for their, and hopefully every other, number’s plight?”

- Page 137

“I once said to a Three in his spiritual journey, ‘How much you must have loved your father that you left your true self behind to please him.’ The man wept, as if relieved to know that love, not emptiness, lay behind his mask.”

- Page 137

😭😭

“As kids, Threes felt they needed to set aside their true selves to become the perfect prototype of whatever sort of person the important people in their lives associated with success.”

- Page 137

“At the end of the day, Threes care most about efficiency and completing a task. Feelings are messy, and they slow your progress toward your goal, so Threes don’t spend too much time on them.”

- Page 136

“‘I wear a thousand masks, but which is the authentic me?’ When this flash of insight comes to them it surfaces a Three’s worst fear: ‘What if there’s no one behind the image? What if I’m no more than an empty suit?’”

- Page 134

“Immature Threes need to win and make it look easy. For them, taking second place is a patronizing euphemism for being the first loser.”

- Page 133

*cough, cough* Abby Lee *cough*

“...Threes lose touch with who they authentically are. In time they so overidentify with their glittering persona that their true self gets lost in the performance. They, along with everyone else, are fooled into believing their false image is WHO THEY REALLY ARE.”

- Page 133

I capitalize because I can’t use italics

“‘The real question is, can you love the real me?... Not that image you had of me, but who I really am.’ - Christine Feehan”

- Page 130

I don’t know if it’s just me, but I feel we got to learn about the flaws of Twos and what they look like when they’re unhealthy. I was honestly hoping to see a lot more love for them especially considering that the co-author is literally a Two... The message I seemed to get from this is Twos are fake. Every person can be genuine. I guess I just wanted to see good things as well bad. If I was a 2, I’d feel sad

“Like all numbers in the Feeling Triad, they believe that if they show their true selves to the world, it will lead to rejection.”

- Page 125

“Unusually sensitive, these kids [Twos] wear their hearts on their sleeves. Sometimes there’s a hint of sadness about them because they don’t see themselves as lovable.”

- Page 121

“Twos believe they live in a world in which you have to be needed before you can be loved, and where you have to give to get. And because they don’t believe you’d keep them around if they ever failed to render your service, Twos find it hard to put a cap on the time and energy they’ll devote to taking care of you.”

- Page 116

“‘Whenever I was in front of a group of people I felt like I had a 3-by-5 card taped to my forehead with the words ‘Do you love me yet?’ written on it.’”

- Page 119

[Twos]