claud > Recent Status Updates

Thought this was gonna happen to me when a hot masc mechanic appeared after checking my Subaru but instead of hitting on me she informed me that I drove over a nail so perfectly it’s simply a part of the rubber now until I replace my tires and that she’s never seen someone do that before with concern on her face <3

It’s taking me forever to get thru this my b

Hey dawg WHAT

Bring out edward Cullen ! Bring out carmilla ! Bring out nosferatu !!!!!!!!!!!!!

buggies !

Sorry is he alluding that the lost myth featuring a random nobody he’s found dating back to the trojan war is actually the story of …. Jesus Christ ????????????? As in son of christian god capital G and not any relevant greek god/s Jesus ????????

Kicking my feet & giggling bcuz Ginny reminds me of a perpetual crush I have

The lack of communication has me DIZZY

Reading all the romances I meant to read on a beach now !

This is set in Maine and not Big Sur bcuz- [armored guards drag me away]

Petah the horse is here !

Also Libby needs to go to hell bcuz they didn’t tell me this was a sequel :| thank god it’s classic Ali Smith litfic where it does nawt matter where you start reading

this happened to my good friend gaggy

Going thru it doesn’t begin to describe the horrors this woman is facing

It sounds so bad but I’m so excited for the part where the plot actually starts and her life goes to hell

Wait , kind of obsessed w her

One of the minor characters has my name and the audiobook narrator is pronouncing TF out of it like that IS how my parents intended for it to be said damn

I just don’t understand how she talks to her kids like they’re 5 and 50 at the same time and also I I cannnoooittt figure out where tf on the cape they are bcuz I don’t think the audiobook reader is saying any town name ??

I like reading slice of life books but This cannot possibly be how an “average” family speaks to each other !!

Maddie if you’re seeing this I got off the Libby holds list !!!!!!!!

Bro I don’t think these people even like each other I think they just spent all their time together oh my god

I’m so sorry this woman is such a bad journalist and not in a fun romcom way but in an oh my god why are you saying that to your source and also not defending yourself way

She’s learning abt ocd and exposure therapy thru first principles

Babes I think & fear you might be dead 🫢

Loving the writing mainly bcuz it’s used two of my fav words, “sluice” and “ciggy”. Favs for dif reasons ofc but sometimes w audiobooks im like a dog waiting to hear the word t-r-e-a-t

Didn’t realize how hungry the way they describe food would make me bcuz I assumed I’d be distracted by the murders

Just saw a spoiler review on tiktok of this and I have to say they’re marketing this as satire so certain tradwives don’t *actually* sue bcuz hooooooly

Natalie and her husband are coughing baby vs hydrogen bomb

Got a fancy butter as a housewarming gift so figured it was a good time for this

a lot of thoughts I’ll keep to myself for now but this is so good & I just KNOW this is getting passed around with the same level of secrecy as 50 shades of grey in some circles…