Ashley Baucom > Recent Status Updates

Dang she really named herself Carpet

Telemachus you cannot speak to my boy Eumaeus like that

I think the gods let all of this misery come upon Odysseus because he rudely forgot to thank the phoenicians

I like that the ghost of Agamemnon’s main word of advice is “my wife killed me, never trust any women again”

“A bad day for adultery!” is the funniest possible response to Hephaestus catching Ares with Aphrodite. Also the Polyphemus sequence is scary. I may need to close my eyes in the movie for that part if we’re doing R-rated violence 💀

All these people think Odysseus is like the most powerful dude ever. They’re lucky they’ll never meet 16-year-old Percy Jackson

I like how Odysseus makes a conscious decision to use his rizz

Calypso don’t give us your sob story… you are forcing him to stay there 😭

In the movie is Menelaus gonna say let me tell you something

I love that the knights of ren refer to themselves as “guys”. “We’re your guys”

Kylo getting ragebaited almost to the level that I got ragebaited by bob iger when he turned down the hunt for ben solo

I know to expect something unhinged whenever Vaneé shows up but I genuinely could not have anticipated this… vaneé you are such a sheep. I was so shocked that I laughed for a good 30 seconds. No way Kylo is gonna let you work for him bud 😭

I’m usually against translation in Star Wars books- I don’t want to know what R2 is actually saying- but in this case… oh my. Somehow artoo saying that Anakin doesn’t talk to him anymore may be the most devastating line in this book

The way that Mace, Yoda, and Obi-Wan each individually have this whole plot at least 95% figured out

Dude… this book man.

Rest in peace count dooku he got hit by a lightsaber
Now i think about him every time I see Darth Vader
Kaboom
Kablow
Kaboom

I’m already devastated. My jaw actually physically dropped several times. The feeling of dread is insane. And Anakin and Obi-Wan haven’t even made it to the Chancellor yet.