Chloe > Recent Status Updates

a slow start but now this is all kinds of weird and fucked up and gross and hard to read. 10/10.

round 11 here we go lads. i am in. the. trenches.

every word this captain says is a punch in the gut bc it’s the same voice as palamedes mother fucking sextus aka the worst thing in the world

the problem is i have listened to moira quirk read the locked tomb to me for a total of, oh, about 500 hours?

hearing her voice in another context is making me feel SO weird

GIGGLING. KICKING MY FEET. AIR IS FOR THE WEAK. ISTVHAN MY KING.

finally i have figured it out. my favourite romance trope is two idiots having to be informed by the entire world, many times, that they’re hopelessly in love with each other

i am Giddy with second hand excitement. no one is more pleased about these developments than me except perhaps my gyal izzy.

okay the idea of a giant hunk of a man in full armour and paladin regalia sitting in a corner quietly knitting pink socks is actually very funny

things lady trent and I have in common:
1. Mega nerd
2. mouth not always connected to brain

and most importantly,

3. uncontrollable rizz

forget kiriona, once paul gets born the saddest girl in the whole world is me.

my enjoyment of this story increase exponentially when they went to wales and it’s not even particularly relevant to the plot

sun: out
tea: brewed
dress: on

time to go loud bitches

i love this so much i could cry actually

no matter how many times i read this, ”when i am in heaven i will remember your mouth. and when you roast down in hell, i think you will remember mine” goes so HARD

taking notes on DIY lobotomies don’t mind me

“clearing her mind of the rampant thoughts in her head before wading out of the fragrant depths and settling her tired bones in the steaming sauna.”

because god forbid a noun lack an adjective

if camilla motherfucking hect has no fans i am dead

‘never work with children’ said the teenager to the other teenager

magnus quinn my beloved, if you and abigail ever break up give me a call

surely sunshine and smut will cure me

(bo burnham voice) how we feeling out there tonight? yehhhhh i am not feeling good…

That sex scene made me feel ill. Someone take the word 'clavicle' out of Vera Raye's vocabulary now.

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That sex scene made me viscerally uncomfortable. Someone take the word clavicle out of Vera Raye's vocabulary, I beg of you.

it’s a little weird that the only women that are ever nice to lan are killed tragically to progress her plot… the other women in this story seem to hate her on sight for no real reason and she has to rely on men to get help anywhere…

”so many crimes are solved by a happy accident … or by someone of the right nationality happening to be within five miles of the scene without an alibi”

whoop whoop. even in 1993 in his own police sub-series big T says fuck the police

oh this is GOOD good

🎶 sweet home alabama 🎶

i’m so happy right now… that can only mean one thing… i’m about to be emotionally ruined

january blues? why not read a slightly creepy almost murder mystery book about death and grief and loss? that’ll get the spirits up (no pun intended)

maybe the reason i’m single is because deep down i’m holding out hope that one day scientists will find a way to make book characters real and i can finally marry carrot