Alysa > Recent Status Updates

Helm’s Deep checkpoint 📍 Legolas and Gimli’s book bromance is so much more bromancey than I remember it being

End of the first book. I used to skip all the songs, but now I look forward to them.
“I sit beside the fire and think
of people long ago
and people who will see a world
that I shall never know.
But all the while I sit and think
of times there were before,
I listen for returning feet
and voices at the door.”

First and possibly only instance of Legolas and Frodo speaking in the books: Legolas sings him a lil song about Nimrodel and Amroth. Frodo says nothing, could not care less.

Tolkien: “The Council of Elrond was super long, we don’t have to go through it word for word” *proceeds to drop 15k words worth of HEAVY lore and it was, in fact, almost word for word*

Rivendell checkpoint 📍 also GLORFINDEL 😫

I would die for Tom Bombadil and his obese pony Fatty Lumpkin

Fatty Bolger was 🤏this🤏 close to being in the Fellowship

Everytime I see this book I think of that one Family Guy joke, “There’s no WAY you read that”

“I will say that Miss Piggy and I had *quite* a good time together, both on set and in our trailers. Fortunately, our dalliances never led to any tension with Kermit — I was clever about it.”
This memoir actually has everything I’ve ever wanted to know about Tim Curry.

I was led to believe these vampires would be gayer. Also I need Louis to stop describing the 5 year old as “seductive” right now

So far I’ve learned that pregnancy increases a woman’s risk for EVERYTHING, but also not ever getting pregnant increases a woman’s risk for ovarian cancer…

The female body is a PRISON.

I don’t think I’ve ever disliked a main character more than Rin. She has been CONSISTENTLY incompetent, argumentative, clueless, immature with ZERO character development. Homegirl we are THREE BOOKS IN I AM TIRED