Ellie > Recent Status Updates

“alls fair in war and the apocalypse” matt im so sorry you have to a) fight a dragon alone and b) fight that dragon with a hammer and c) been told you’ll literally die in this fight for the past three weeks. your pov is the only one i care about

“the surge of relief at getting to tell them the truth was overwhelming.”
SO glad you’re telling them the truth, Fen! congrats on taking only 220 pages to do it!!

Matt: *fighting unimaginable horrors for a 13 year-old*
Fen: “the wolf pack i unwillingly became alpha of doesn’t like me :/“
so like… so like can i skip Fen’s chapters yet or do i have to read them?

Ray and Reyna are the most disposable, underdeveloped, and useless characters i’ve ever encountered in a main cast… they’ve been here all three books and have done approximately nothing but being goth and scared.

(spoilers!)

AND THATS HOW YOU WRITE A THREE BOOK SLOW BURN!! CHAPTER 75 OF THE THIRD BOOK IS THE PERFECT TIME FOR A LOVE CONFESSION

i feel betrayed smh

WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DIDNT SEND THEM TO THE CASTLE I THOUGHT WE ESTABLISHED SHE WASNT A TRAITOR GOD I HATE IT HERE (unfortunately i don’t, i love it here)

and they DIDNT have sex in that bed. there was only one bed. and a couch. this author is the queen of “here’s a trope! it’s not going to go the way you think 🤪 “

back to your regularly scheduled fuckery featuring himbo and bimbo at the costume ball

its TIIIIIIMEEEEE FOR THE SLUTTY LITTLE BALL GOWN EEEEEEEEEE

“one of Rennedawn’s most powerful lords”
“Roland finished her sentence ‘is closer than we thought.’”
“and i think Benedict is the one who cast it.”
“the Villain’s, of course”
“and then they were ambushed”

one of these days a chapter will end without quippy one liner and i will cry on that day

i’m so close to finishing this fucking book my brain is melting i miss dialogue and quality character growth so much

telemachus my beloved

“sweet son, you are right, the world is a wild and terrible place, and worth shouting at. But you are safe now, and all of us need to sleep. Will you let us have a little peace?” pg 225

if i don’t quote this to my crying child one day it’s cause i didn’t like the books ending

omg odysseus hiiiiiii

forgot to log me starting this one on goodreads oopsies but man i’m waiting for Medea to come crawling back to Aiaia

did… did the book get good? guys am i enjoying it?

deus ex machina in the form of side characters explaining everything to children and giving them bags of holding?? yeah... okay sure yea… we’ll see where this goes but i swear to god if laurie runs out of arrows after they made it so she couldn’t, im going to scream

in the last 80 pages Fen has gone from my favorite character to my least favorite. i didn’t know he would turn out to be an asshole jeez

okay so i need the plot to start picking up actually

this doofus left his finger prints at the crime scene smh

HERA I LOVE YOU

man…

GEORGE I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU LOOK ILL NEVER FORGIVE YOU

what do you MEAN it’s due tomorrow :(

i don’t trust penelope as far as i can throw her

Lucy Carlyle you will always be beautiful to me

muderbot youre so funny you should narrate a novella

i’ve decided nonfiction takes forever to read actually