Lexi > Recent Status Updates

“You complain because things don’t arrange themselves around you like a bouquet of flowers, without your taking the slightest trouble to do anything. But I never asked as much: I wanted action.”

“Existence is not something which lets itself be thought of from a distance: it must invade you suddenly, master you, weigh heavily on your heart like a great motionless beast- or else there is nothing more at all.”

“A tree scrapes at the earth under my feet with a black nail. I would so like to let myself go, forget myself, sleep. But I can’t, I’m suffocating: existence penetrates me everywhere, through the eyes, the nose….”

“This face is so outspoken, so frank- but their tender, abstract soul will never let itself be touched by the sense of a face.”

“You see that you don’t love them. You wouldn’t recognize them in the street. They’re only symbols in your eyes. You are not at all touched by them: you’re touched by the Youth of the Man, the Love of Man and Woman, the Human Voice.”

“What held me back was the idea that no one, absolutely no one, would be moved by my death, that I would be even more alone in death than in life.”

“I am the one who pulls myself from the nothingness to which I aspire.”

“I am the Thing. Existence, liberated, detached, floods over me. I exist.”

“How can I, who have not the strength to hold to my own past, hope to save the past of someone else?”

“I have only my body: a man who entirely alone, with his lonely body, cannot indulge in memories; they pass through him. I shouldn’t complain: all I wanted was to be free.”

“I try to refresh my memory; I need to feel all the tenderness that Anny inspires; it is there, this tenderness, it is near me, only asking to be born. But the smile does not return : it is finished. I remain dry and empty.”

“She must struggle patiently in front of mirrors to save her face: it isn’t vanity or fear of growing old; she wants to stay as she is, just as she is.”

“And then you attribute this property to events which appear to you in the instants; what belongs to the form you carry over to the content.”

“I do not know whether the whole world has suddenly shrunk or whether I am the one who unifies all sounds and shapes. I cannot conceive of anything around me being other than what it is.”

“I was desperate with grief and anger, for whatever it was going to be, I had wanted to live her death with her. And she had cheated me of what seemed the greatest gift she could make me, my chance to love her, no matter how poor, mad, terrible. It wouldn’t have mattered.”

“All night, When I returned to my own bed, I was unable to sleep a wink because of restlessness and a queer kind of nausea.”

“So, as the room darkened I read her the whole of ‘Sappho to Philaenis’, or nearly the whole of it”