Dan Apted > Recent Status Updates

just found a condom tucked between the pages okay yes very pithy person who borrowed this from the library before me

there were about 15 similes in the first 5 pages - this does not bode well

Lucy Rose you are incredible at creating a Vibe but i am ready for something to happen now

this is so insane but I'm kind of obsessed with it

I'm sorry this is so fucking dumb

why are we pretending Achilles and Patroclus weren't gay for each other

Natalie Haynes you are a real one for including that list of characters because I'm not even a quarter of the way through and I've already had to refer back to that multiple times to remind myself who's who

GIRL GET UP

girl get UP

girl get UP

really not sure i can be arsed with another 150 pages of her having a manic pixie dream girl off with her greasy old boyfriend

please may you let us know how the characters are feeling without just changing the adjectives used to describe their love-making

if Stefan's uncle turns out to be her old mentor i will give up on this book so quick

falling in love with your nazi handler after a few weeks is deeply cringe, edith

okay so obviously she was shagging her mentor