Sam R > Recent Status Updates

I didn’t expect the Queen’s hand to be so sweaty, so soggy. I was also surprised that her accent was Southern and not British. I expected lockjawed noblesse oblige, but I got “Y’all come back and visit Buckingham Palace real soon, y’hear.”

“Children’s book”

“The city had a long history of suicide, attracting pilgrims from all over the world seeking a Lourdes not of hope, but of despair, assuming that suicide in Budapest, like love in Paris or greed in New York, would somehow be more authentic.”

“If I knew you were this cold I’d’ve asked you to keep a bottle of beer for me close to your heart.”

“The recently published How to Lose a Million and a Half and Bounce Back Smiling, already named a Book of the Month and picking up a devout group of followers growing larger every day, including indicted embezzlers, retired moonshiners, and perpetual litigants,”

“Spend enough time around emergency rooms, you’re apt to see anything. Light sockets, vacuum cleaners, that general diameter, the minute it gets invented, some genius finds a way to put their johnson into it.”

“Glow Tripforth del Vasto is here on assignment for Hep Debutante magazine, sending in a series of articles on how to be a Jazz Age adventuress on a Depression budget.”

Not the easiest to keep track of chronologically but I’m getting it

“Does cheese, considered as a living entity, also possess consciousness?”

“All normal as club soda, yet somehow… too normal,”