Anica > Recent Status Updates

i know a bell hooks book hates to see me coming🙏🏼

während dem lesen denke ich die ganze zeit darüber nach, dass ich zwar immer noch extremely hurt bin, aber es ja auch irgendwelche gründe gehabt haben muss, wieso es so gelaufen ist, wie es ist

idk why aber irgendwie brauch ich für dieses buch vieeel länger als für communion oder all about love; obwohl hier die “male” perspective beleuchtet wird (und ich bei den beiden anderen obviously mehr relaten konnte, insbesondere wegen den zeitpunkten, an denen ich sie gelesen hab), muss ich bei diesem buch viel mehr über alles nachdenken/beschäftigt mich die “male” perspective viel länger uff

uff

obviously wird voll oft über väterliche liebe (or the lack of) geredet und als ich in der bahn aus dem fenster geschaut habe, ist die bahn nach deidesheim an mir vorbeigefahren and now two things reminded me of my dad (und das noch im juli aka the month that makes me think about him all the time anyway)

„Patriarchy demands of men that they become and remain emotional cripples. Since it is a system that denies men full access to their freedom of will, it is difficult for any man of any class to rebel against patriarchy, to be disloyal to the patriarchal parent, be that parent female or male.“ (p. 27)

“Only a revolution of values in our nation will end male violence, and that revolution will necessarily be based on a love ethic. To create loving men, we must love males. Loving maleness is different from praising and rewarding males for living up to sexist-defined notions of male identity.

“Usually rage, grief, and unrelenting disappointment lead women and men to close off the part of themselves that was hoping to be touched and healed by male love. They lean. then to settle for whatever positive attention men are able to give. They learn to overvalue it. They learn to pretend that it is love. They learn how not to speak the truth about men and love. They learn to live the lie.” (p. 2)

“So many seekers after love are taught in childhood to feel unworthy, that nobody could love them as they really are, and they construct a false self. In adult life they meet people who fall in love with their false self. But this love does not last.

“Giving is the way we also learn how to receive. The mutual practice of giving and receiving is an everyday ritual when we know true love.
A generous heart is always open, always ready to receive our going and coming. In the midst of such love we need never fear abandonment. This is the most precious gift true love offers-the experience of knowing we always belong.” (p. 164)

ich muss die ganze zeit an satellite von harry styles denken während ich das lese

hab mit meiner therapeutin über das buch gesprochen und sie findet‘s gut, dass ich mich mit diesem thema auseinandersetze🙂‍↕️(sie denkt ich hab ein faslches bild von liebe und romantischen beziehungen) (shes right)

„The wounded child inside many males is a boy who, when he first spoke his truths, was silenced by paternal sadism, by a patriarchal world that did not want him to claim his true feelings. The wounded child inside many females is a girl who was taught from early childhood on that she must become something other than herself, deny her true feelings, in order to attract and please others.“ (p. 49)