riona > Recent Status Updates

why do i relate to cal trask? 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

lee’s background is so heartbreaking
his poor mother
her eyes were gone by the time his father found her. the duality of evil and good of east of eden is shown especially here.

so far I love cathy…. i love how steinback carries the storyline, the words, mesmerizing as if i’m remembering it. the narrative itself being captivatingly human. and the characters themselves, a mosiac of life. within the intervals between reading i find myself itching to read.

I feel too much in reading this that I am scared. a northwestern girl in her thoughtless existence and the contemptible narrator who hates but adores her senseless, pitiful living. a putrid, waif and ugly northwestern girl, who knows nothing but to live as it is. threateningly afraid if she knew, as knowing is the silence feared at night of acre street. a nasty life. this girl who does not embody. merely existing.

135-139 are one of the most relatable ruminations the narrator had in the book “I wanted to know about that everything. And I had sold my soul in order to find out. But now I was understanding that I had not sold it to the devil, but much more dangerously: to God. Who had let me see. Since He knew that I would not know how to see whatever I saw..I had the ability to ask the question, but not to hear the answer.”

“I was already living the hell through which I was yet to pass, but I didn't know if all I had to do was pass through it, or if Id have to stay there. I was already coming to know that this hell is horrible and good, maybe I myself wanted to stay there.”

“… we ourselves were the unknown law that we obeyed. The renewedly original sin is this: I must fulfill my law which I am unaware, and if I dont fufill my ignorance, I shall be originally sinning against life"

"Because my hoarseness was already the hoarseness of someone enjoying a gentle hell.”

"The deepest murder: the one that is a way of relating, a way of one being existing the other being, a way of seeing one other and being one other and having one other, murder where there is neither victim nor executioner, bur a link of mutual ferocity.
My prmary struggle for life. "Lost in the Fiery Hell of a Canyon a Woman Desperately struggles for Life.”

(cont.) existence —the existence of what? the existence of the world. With reverence I feared the existence of the world for me.”

“Everything could be fercely summed up in never emitting a first scream -a first scream unleashes all the others, the first scream at birth unleashes a life, if I screamed I would awaken thousands of screaming beings who would loose upon the rooftops a chorus of screams and horror. If I screamed I would unleash the existence… (cont.)”

“An eye warched over my life. This eye was probably what I would probably now call truth, now morality, now human law, now God, now me. I lived mostly inside a mirror. Two minutes after my birth I had already lost my origins."

“Where can one think of fleeing, if the cell is everything? … And i feel an overwhelming, absurd desire for a kind of satanism before satan, a desire that one day—a day without time or substance—an escape leading outside of God will be discovered, and our deepest selves will somehow cease participating in being and non-being.” pg. 45

“Oh, how lonely it is in the open country at night, in the midst of that singing when you yourself cannot sing; in the midst of the incessant cries of joy when you yourself cannot be joyful, when the moon, which cares not whether it is spring or winter, whether men are alive or dead, looks down, lonely, too.” pg. 502

impressed with how beautifully chekhov handles short stories. however compacted each story is, its simplicity has its own complexion in moral and ethical themes. chekhov’s prose is concise, but delivers such a heavy weight of realism despite the light material. i can see myself reading my favorite stories from him before bedtime when i finish this. bittersweet aching life: peasantry, law, love and religion … etc