Sloane Baxter > Recent Status Updates

I too would like to spend my mornings gossiping and my afternoons eating meat pie.

if he’s not searching the earth for a mirror to shatter and free me, he’s not the one I fear.

why is the middle child always character development give me beth back????????????????????????

anodos is a little bit of a skank?????????? who is this marble lady and where has the tree gone HELLO?!

i too hope to enter my cougar era on page 8 of my life.

if I had half the brain Lewis did, I would be (conservatively) 38,902% more insufferable than my current state.

I think all Heathcliff really needed was maybe like two listens of the album Ceremonials by Florence and the Machine and then might have stopped beating children and exhuming bodies.

is there literally anyone in this novel who is not a little bitch

clive calling the homosexual encounters of his classmates “a perversion [that] was the only chink through which something spontaneous and uncalculating could creep in” was not something I was prepared to read.

someone tell my dad. also, I’m anglican now.

“what I felt…was sheer appetite” and you know what clive? that was me seeing Mr. Tumnus circa. 2005 too.

“I cAn FiX hIm” nah let’s just destroy one another. and we’re all laughing a little too much. someone’s dying soon I feel it. please be joseph.

he’s forgiving england but shan’t forgive him. dad’s pissing me off. brother better not die. so far, so good I’d say.

“I wonder if she was a gossip” and now I’m 200 pages into the life story of some lady from a quaternary source.

finally someone hates england almost as much as I do