Autumn > Recent Status Updates

For 900 pages I thought “izard” was a quaint, colloquial spelling of “lizard”.
It is a goat. A goat?! You learn something new every day.

I am beginning to fear that when Radcliffe named this “Mysteries”, she was not offering a mystery to solve, but instead questions that will NEVER BE ANSWERED. I’m about to lose my mind.

Oh YOU think their opinion it’s the devil wandering around at night is “too much”? YOU who over imagine LITERALLY EVERY SOUND and hear ghostly music and think your dad is haunting you? I love you Em, but shut up.

“There,” said Montoni, speaking for the first time in several hours, “is Udolpho.”
Me: FINALLY. I was beginning to believe it didn’t exist. NOW can the mysteries begin after 400+ pages???!

Emily! We were going to read those letters together! I can’t believe you’ve done this to me. Call me a bad daughter but I’m DISAPPOINTED you kept your promise. *sulks*

Yet another classic where I sat down with zero foreknowledge of what I was getting into, and being thoroughly charmed. One hundred pages so far of pastoral ambles, poems, and… a case of friendly fire on the man you’re hoping your daughter falls in love with.

Chapter 16: I could probably read this chapter a million times. Like good god, you two, pull yourselves together and kiss already.

Imagine my delight realizing this was written by a woman. My ignorance astounds. My whimsy elated.

How had I forgotten just how much I adore Kavax and Sophocles?! If only all problems could be solved by a fox who loves grape candies.

Ash’s bloody spudload recipe. Luvluvluverly…

Chapter 2: You cannot just make bitch into an adverb.
Jay Kristoff: *creates Gabriel de Leon* “Stop being bitchly about it.”

Chapter 13: I am actually going to throw up. Perfect combination of disgust and horror.

Dalinar seeing Kaladin too late. Kaladin seeing Shallan too late. Syl. 🥲😭😭 Stop hurting my babies. I’m with Stormfather in terms of intensity of emotion rn.

Chapter 57: I am shaking. Physically shaking from second-hand adrenaline.

Chapter 52: Amaram’s blade is the biggest oh 😳 Oh 🫣 OOOH 🤯 moment this is KILLING ME DOES THIS MEAN WHAT I THINK IT MEANS??? I think it DOES.

I’m Shallan Davar, feminine wile extraordinaire, my job is to seduce a highprince, get him talking about himself and his magical Shardplate, what deeply poised question could I ask? “What if you need to poop?”

I’m dead on the floor.

Chapter 36: Two quipsters meet and I’m SQUEALING with delight. This is the best banter Sanderson has ever written.

“Drearifying.” Reason 1,345,239 I love Syl the best.

Not even ten chapters in and you kill my favorite? MY FAVORITE? This has better be a tease.

Chapter 55: You know the foreshadowing is good when you come to the same realization as the character a paragraph before they do. Excellent track laying. The Quiet: shivers!

Chapter 31: I hate this book I hate this book I hate this BOOK.

Chapter 17: Autumn learns that “slalom” is a word. A real, not made-up-for-scifi word. Boggled.

"I have been told I speak like the villain in some Eudoran opera."

Oh lord—ok, reevaluating my mental image of this man… and loving it.

Chapter 20: YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO MAKE FUN OF HIM NOT KILL HIS WIFE, CARL.

Chapter 14: Jack the Ripper Enters the Dungeon. IT’S A MOUNTAIN OF ROTTING PROSTITUTES, CARL.

Chapter 4: Slender Clown. NOPE I DON’T LIKE THIS, CARL.

Kingfisher knows how to write one kind of man: chivalrous, self-depreciating guard dog.
And I eat them up every time. No arrogant alphaholes in sight 🤣

Chapters 25-26: Weeping and Throwing Up