Joanna > Recent Status Updates

I'm not sure I'd like to be burned. I think I might like to be fed to zoo animals. It would be both environmentally friendly and a lovely treat for the larger carnivores. Could you request that, I wondered. I made a mental note to write to the WWF in order to find out.

"Empress. Poetry. I'm usually called worse things."
"By who? Tell me their names. I'll gently correct their error."
"Gently?"
"You can gently remove a tongue."
😆

Focus on the present, she told herself firmly. The ones that are alive. Looking into the dead was no different from standing still and letting someone punch you repeatedly.

Perhaps the key was to realize that peace lay in survival, past the scars and pinches and among righteous revenge, not surrender. What a dangerous, dangerous thought.

"If I must choose between two bloodthirsty men, I would rather stand by a fiend who fights for his love than a fiend who fights for himself."
-Stieg

"(...) Even when things look as hopeless as they've ever been, you never give up. No matter how much pain you're in. You never remove any chance at LIFE. Because you never know when something could change. Something you never even expected."
-Lorian

"You get to believe anything you want. Why would you choose to believe you will fail?"
-Lorian

It's Ruth, isn't it.

Wait... So the witch tower was used and turned everything to ash, and yet there's still a whole as army left afterwards? How truly devastating is it if most people survived the blast? They kill everything in sight, except not really? Why are we making such a big deal of these witch towers?

Once again people are dying in droves, and our glorious, amazing, incredible, awe-inspiring Aelin is doing nothing - not a damn thing - to stop it, despite it being said ON PAGE she could have ended the battle with four blasts of her power. Oh, but she's TrAuMaTiSeD, so sorry, but thousands of soldiers have to die needlessly. That's just how it goes with dear Aelin, doesn't it.

"Can't sleep, mała miłość?"
Tell me you never spoke Polish a day in your life without telling me. You CANNOT translate word for word! It never works! I thought we knew this! "Little love" would translate to maybe "moja kochana" or "moja mała/malutka" but no one EVER would say "mała miłość," especially without the gendered conjugation! Ugh. If you don't know what you're doing, just stick to English please.

The painting is the sea that Wolf tells Wren he sees. The painting in his mother's bedroom. Damn, I guessed it on page, what - 20? Pfff!

I'm calling it again - Betima is modified. A healer.

I'm on page 27 and already know the voice in Wren's head is the "hot, rude stranger at the inn", which is also the love interest. Hopefully that is not the plot twist. I'd be pissed if it is.

My predictions 1/5 of the way into the book:

Rosalie killed the woman in room 201 because she thought her husband was having an affair and was jealous. Her "illness" is that she's a psychopath.

Scott will discover the body, but will not report it because of his feelings for Quinn. Possibly will clean up the crime scene as well.

I hope I'm wrong of course and a plot twist I cannot see is coming.

Why is every main character always so slow and stupid??

It's the uncle, isn't it.

It feels like all I'm reading is them sneaking in and out of the house. Can Julian just freaking wait outside so we can get on with the plot instead of pages upon pages of needless drama just trying to enter and leave the house???

This is definitely a book for people who speak Spanish.

"We had to move the bed", Jonathan reminds me. "It's propped against the wall."
"So I'll sleep at an angle."
"You will not." I think Wendy knows I'm joking, but it's sort of hard to tell. "He will not. Jonathan, you're not letting him sleep at an angle. We didn't raise you to let guests sleep at an angle."
Jonathan sighs. "He's not going to sleep at an angle, Mum."

Upending the bird, I coax it open and gently drop the halves of lemon into it. "You see? It just goes in. You don't have to get wrist deep."
"It says STUFF. Stuff, to me, implies vigour."

What can I say? I like my men like I like my employment prospects: rough and hairy.

🤣🤣

"What are your thoughts on parsnips?"
"I thought they went downhill after their third album. What do you mean, what are my thoughts on parsnips? I don't have thoughts on parsnips. Who has thoughts on parsnips? Who has time to have thoughts on parsnips?"
🤣🤣

I look sorry enough for myself at breakfast that Jonathan (...) almost gives something vaguely like the impression that he might be beginning to feel something that might at some point move somewhere in the direction of guilty.

There's woodpeckers here, apparently, and Dartford warbles. Not that I'd know a Dartford warbler if I fell over one while it was warbling its distinctive warble of 'I'm from Dartford '. 🤣🤣

Nostalgia read - I read this decades ago, translated into my native Polish. Time for the English translation, and to see if this story is as charming as I remember it being.

This book is hitting a little too hard right now :'(

I am deducting a whole star already for all the French phrases that I do not understand and have to stop reading to google translate. Rubbish!

So she did have an editor! Michelle Rosquillo. Deary me. Those thanks were totally undeserved.

"It seems like she got the best of both of us before stabbing us both in the back by stabbing Father through the chest and throat."

Even on the last page she could not help herself. I bet these things sounded brilliant in her head.