Hataikwan > Recent Status Updates

Trust is like a china plate. If you break it once, with some care and attention you can put it back together again. But if you break it again, it splits into even more pieces and it takes far longer to piece together again. If you break it more and more times, eventually it shatters to the point where it’s impossible to restore. There are too many broken pieces, and too much dust.

Without trust, the relationship doesn't actually mean anything.

Without conflict, there can be no trust. Conflict exists to show us who is there for us unconditionally and who is just there for the benefits.

When your highest priority is to always make ourselves feel good, or to always make our partner feel good, then nobody ends up feeling good.

Acts of love are valid only if they're performed without conditions or expectations.

We are defined by what we choose to reject. If we reject nothing, we essentially have no identity at all.

We all must give a fuck about something, in order to value something. And to value something, we must reject what is not that something. To value X, we must reject non-X.

We are without values and therefore live our life without any purpose.

Freedom grants the opportunity for greater meaning, but by itself there is nothing necessarily meaningful about it.

When inspiration is seen as a reward rather than a prerequisite we propel ourselves ahead. We feel free to fail, and the failure moves us forward.

Action isn't just the effect of the motivation; it's also the cause of it.

Don't just sit there. Do something. The answers will follow.

Life is about not knowing and then doing something anyway.

You don't know anything. Even when you think you do, you really don't know what the fuck you're doing. So really, what is there to lose?

Learn to sustain the pain you've chosen. When you choose a new value, you are choosing to introduce a new form of pain into your life. Relish it. Savor it. Welcome it with open arms. Then act despite it.

We can be truly successful only at something we're willing to fail at. If we're unwilling to fail, the we're unwilling to succeed

Improvement at anything is based on thousands of tiny failures, and the magnitude of your success is based on how many times you’ve failed at something.

If it feels like it's you versus the world, chances are it's really just you versus yourself.

It's worth remembering that for any change to happen in your life, you must be wrong about something.

I say don't find yourself. I say never know who you are. Because that's what keeps you striving and discovering.

Until we change how we view ourselves, what we believe we are and are not, we cannot overcome our avoidance and anxiety. We cannot change.

Before we can look at our values and prioritizations and change them into better, healthier ones, we must first become uncertain of our current values.

The only way to solve our problems is to first admit that our actions and beliefs up to this point have been wrong and are not working.

The more we admit we do not know, the more opportunities we gain to learn.

Uncertainty is the root of all progress and growth.

The more you embrace being uncertain and not knowing, the more comfortable you will feel in knowing you don't know. Uncertainty removes our judgments of others.

The more you try to be certain about something, the more uncertain and insecure you will feel.

If our hearts and minds are so unreliable, maybe we should be questioning our own intentions and motivations more.

Our beliefs are malleable and our memories are horribly unreliable.

We're in a perpetual state of misleading ourselves and others for no other reason than that out brain is designed to be efficient, not accurate.