Guya > Recent Status Updates

“Sometimes the visionary aspect of any particular day comes to you in the memory or it, or it opens to you over time.”
“Transgression. That is legalism. There is never just one transgression. There is a wound in the flesh of human life that scars when it heals and often enough never seems to heal at all.
Avoid transgression. How’s that for advice.”

This is a father's unguarded letter to his son about his life past and present. I think what carries is the idea of leaving the world with no words left unsaid. When I first started telling my parents about The Situation i had a v different outcome in mind. Obv that blew up in my face but the idea stands of pursuing this openness and honesty rather than being riddled with guilt over keeping myself hidden 4ever #real?

the horror of never really knowing

words on a page but then you’re crying

😭😭😭

It’s like seeing an ex ((derogatory so bad I’m still waking up screaming in terror from the nightmares but they’re actually real life))

The part where Dex is only capable of saying heartfelt things to Em when he’s drunk and immediately takes it back / never says it when he’s sober mmmmmmm he never saw her outside of himself and what she does for him at this stage I’m gonna be sickkkkkkk he’s such a cruel fella

Woke up to see i borrowed this on Libby in my sleep #WhatDatMean #DoomAndDespair

i love books that have a little invisible string going on and also the symbol (?) of a house that attracts certain kinds of people esp across centuries :D

I love this sm and want to get a physical copy solely for the BB mountain part #NeverGettingOverIt #AndWhatAboutIt ??? #Help

“In sum, I can’t keep up. I had sworn to myself that I wouldnt paint anymore from sketches. No more winters troubling over autumn’s memory. But this was a conceit of summer where the days seem to pause for a moment in their cloaks of green. The sun doesn’t slow for the painter of sunsets, so why should my woods?”
The unexpected brokeback mountain arc helppppp I can’t escape

A little corny for my taste but it’s pretty sweet and little reprieve from the doom and despair I think

“Standing there alone, I always felt sad, a deep sadness I’d felt before, long ago. I remembered that sadness very well. A sadness that can’t be explained, that doesn’t melt away over time, that quietly leaves invisible wounds, in a place you cannot see. And how do you deal with something you can’t see?” Book of doom and despair

Devastation at normal people level but I can’t look away. Also spilled tea on it so it’s a mosaic staining of tea and tears :D

:’)

I think this book reminds me of what I felt watching grand Budapest hotel where there’s a lot going on but in such a small time frame and it’s also comedic but serious and introspective. I do think I need some more historical context but I’m liking this so far :D

testing :P

‘Our interest’s on the dangerous edge of things.
The honest thief, the tender murderer,
The superstitious atheist’ - Robert Browning

Oooh I think I’m gonna like this one :D

Returned on Libby before I could finish and it’s a 12 weeek wait 🥀🥀🥀🥀

“Dear God I did not want to think about Rebecca. I wanted to be happy…There was no other wish in my heart but that. I could not help if she came to me in thoughts, in dreams. I could not help if i felt like a guest in Manderley, my home, walking where she had trodden, resting where she had lain. I was like a guest biding my time… Little sentences little reproofs reminding me every hour, every day.”

“I have a thought my own life is a footnote to the things that really matter. Never tragic, often hilarious. Or perhaps this is the lie I tell myself. Maybe I pitched my tent where the wind blows strongest hoping it would blow my heart clean out of my body. Perhaps what I am about to write is a betrayal of my younger self by the person I have become. If so, it’s no small sin.”