julia! > Recent Status Updates

he finally got to the grief part. fml.

I am known. I’m only 1/7th through this book, and Pessoa— the f*ck a$$ Lisbon bookkeeper who spent more time creating imaginary friends than balancing ledgers—already has me clocked, chocked, kicked. This isn’t a book; it’s a sigh in literary form, a journal of existential dread so precise it feels like he read my mind before I even had thoughts.

I don’t know if I’ve ever experienced anything as metaphysically de-moralizing(ly lonely) as finishing book II: adolescence’s and feeling so incredibly unease-d AND happy with the fact that Augustine was going through the same shit I am.

I was a line cook in my past life.

“fix me unuther— yew sun ova bitch.”

“it’s stupid to look in your poetry books for hamburgers!”

100 in, and she’s speaking to my younger self.
139 to go, i’m uncovering so much.

(also my spotify ꧁𓊈𒆜🅰🆃🅴!𒆜𓊉꧂ today and it made reading truly a vibe)

it’s fine and then bam. he died. then this, bam. he died. but also this one time, bam. he died.

“Stfu you can’t say you ‘like freud’ that loud.” — Eleanor @ me

I’m gonna ask Sol if I can meet him.