Sabrina > Recent Status Updates

maybe inés lost because she was hitting on the ball machine the night before the match. and smashed a racquet. and stayed up until like 1 am? i don’t think i would play very well if i did all that

i’ve clowned on the tennis writing of this series but i think this is genuinely some of the worst so far. “the first set point was delivered to ines in twenty minutes flat” okay good, she’s slaying. THEN HOW DOES SHE LOSE THE MATCH 6-7, 6-7, 4-6??? THE US OPEN DOESN’T EVEN GO THREE SETS??? HOW DOES ONE GET A SET POINT IN 20 MINUTES AND THEN LOSE THE SET 6-7 WITHOUT THE NARRATION MENTIONING THIS????

i’m sorry but a pro player would not be hitting on a BALL MACHINE the night before the us open. that’s like studying algebra the night before taking the mcat. and don’t get me STARTED on the racquet breaking. you’re a pro. use a better coping strategy

the wine tasting writing is really nice and detailed. it’s leagues better than the actual TENNIS WRITING.

“THINK OF US BEING ATTACHED BY A PIECE OF ROPE”??? THIS IS BEGINNER LEVEL DOUBLES STRATEGY. YOU LEARN THIS AT TENNIS AND LIFE CAMPS (THE GOAT OF TENNIS CAMPS BY THE WAY). HOW ARE YOU PROFESSIONAL TENNIS PLAYERS AND DON’T KNOW DOUBLES STRATEGY. THERE’S NO FUCKING WAY

“it was in my section” no pro tennis player would ever say that while playing doubles. and i’ll tell you why. first of all you wouldn’t say section, you would say side. second of all this is just cartoonishly bad tennis. i know it’s supposed to show how they’re terrible at communicating but come on, you’re pros!!!

RACQUETS DON’T DO THAT

So far, the tennis is quite good but by god the tense changes. Just pick one and stick to it!

AHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

if i hadn’t walked around a real tennis court and had the pro explain it to me i would have absolutely no fucking idea what was happening. also why would you get hungover before such an important match? what of the 48-hour rule?

yuling what have you gotten me into

the SECOND you google “am i gay quiz” it’s over. don’t even bother taking it you know the answer

i can tell that 90% of imogen’s i’m-too-straight-i-can’t-possibly-be-queer neuroses are entirely because of gretchen

imogen it’s going to be okay. i promise. maybe touch some grass

took the eurostar to paris and you know what fucking for

yooooo the professor is still hot wow i really, really wanted to know that. HOW did you know, lev grossman, that i wanted to know this

ok at least he pointed out this new guy is handsome. a win is a win

maybe this is how guys think (shameful if so), but do we really have to introduce every female character by how pretty they are? i immediately get the ick

i love a sopping wet pathetic nick carraway who can’t stop lying to himself and yeah. this is that

wisconsin mentioned 🧀

What kind of topspin does Nicki Chan’s serve have that you could hit an OVERHEAD off of it???

“Volleying back” a serve is, of course, illegal.

Aside from the final, all of the Indian Wells 1995 men's matches were best of three sets. Thus, Huntley could not be playing a fifth set.

It is possible, but rare, for cracks to form in tennis racquets from playing a lot. More likely, a string would break. Would it happen to a pro player who has seven total racquets and presumably switches them out frequently? Maybe, but less likely. Would the racquet “CRACK IN HALF” from the stress of returning a forehand? NO!!! I get we’re in 1995, but the racquets can’t be that bad!!

I’m nitpicking again, but I can’t resist. Twice now, a serve has been described as landing “at [a player’s] feet”. This is, of course, not plausible in tennis. Because either the aforementioned player is standing inside the service box, or the serve is several feet out.

Carrie is training for several hours a day. It’s her full-time job. And she’s eating A SMOOTHIE and RAW ALMONDS for breakfast?? Where are the complex carbs?? Who is her dietitian? How is she not crashing on the court from lack of fuel? My immersion is shattered.

why are you crashing out over this it’s not a big deal

did. did you just say “purple orbs” unironically

HOW ARE YOU IN LOVE WITH HIM. IT HAS BEEN SIX DAYS

i guess din and jeremy knox of the usc trojans have the same abysmal coping mechanisms