Max Freese > Recent Status Updates

Odysseus is really bad at keeping his men alive

if the cyclops ate my friends i'd do more than just poke his eyeball out. i'd slice off his dick and balls and feed it to those damn sheep

Bilbo giving gifts to the hobbits...and he gives Sam the last of Smaug's gold...i'm crying

realizing I never actually read this one

a barrel of tobacco from the shire mysteriously ends up in isengard...bro what is jrr cookin up here

TWO MONTHS in rivendell?? bro what was JRR on

Blocks your path. Leans in real close and whispers, "There was a fifth hobbit and his name was Fatty."

unironically upset that the rest of the book doesn't take place in hobbiton

Beorn feels like a filler arc

they spent FOURTEEN days at Elrond's house?? the fuck

time for a palette cleanse

this book continuously puts me in a dark head space but i can't stop reading because the writing is so damn good