Ask the Author: Danger Slater
Answered Questions (19)
Danger Slater
There was this supposedly haunted amusement park near where I grew up that Old Man Caruthers used to run. I remember some investors tried to buy it one time but Caruthers dressed up like a ghost to scare them off. My dog and I were the ones to figure it out.
Danger Slater
Yeah, right. Pay me.
Danger Slater
Everything was beautiful and nothing hurt. It's tattooed on my arm. BUT I DIDN'T LOOK!
Danger Slater
Just because you end a sentence in a question mark does not automatically make it a question. But let me tell you, I'd rather be sandwiched dry between Brown and Steel than covered in mustard and forced to hang out with Jonathan Franzen
Danger Slater
My hot dog looks like a hot dawg's hot date on the hot day of August 8th.
Danger Slater
Hamsterbation is when you masturbate, but when you finish, instead of semen, hamsters come out of you.
Danger Slater
I hadn't heard the part about the dumpster.
Danger Slater
Probably not. But who knows. Maybe he'll get bored of this and send me more tapir sex videos.
Danger Slater
Unfortunately, I am now...
Danger Slater
It was batshit crazy and highly entertaining, like most of the stuff of his I read. Why are all these questions I'm getting about Jon Konrath?
Danger Slater
Yes. What do I need to do to join? Sacrifice a virgin? If so, then DONE!
Danger Slater
My last book was basically a shot for shot remake of Jon Konrath's last book. Except mine had Anne Hache in it.
Danger Slater
I think he's trying to turn me on/seduce me, in much the same manner our Supreme Court Justice the Honorable Clarence Thomas used to seduce Anita Hill.
Danger Slater
I only ever read Thunderbird so I suppose I'm implored to say that one. How many books has Jon Konrath written? A lot, right?
Danger Slater
The crustiness makes insertion difficult. But I manage. I manage.
Danger Slater
Well I've certainly used a tapir as a pubic wig. But I didn't skin it. I do not, nor have I ever, advocated violence against another living thing. Except spiders. Fuck them.
Danger Slater
The Dan Brown suit is a zoot suit top, with buhjama bottoms, and I wear tissue boxes for shoes in case I need a tissue throughout the day. This'll coincidentally be what the main character in my next book (an "urban" remake of The Da Vinci Code which I'm entitling Yo, MTV Raps presents Da Da Vinci Code) will wear. I'm not saying I'm my main character, but I am.
Danger Slater
Never not none! All your pizza are belong to us!
Danger Slater
Stole it from Dan Brown. I steal all my ideas from Dan Brown. I hear Dan Brown likes pizza. I LIKE PIZZA TOO! I sometimes like to put on a Dan Brown suit and pretend I'm a book writer guy.
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