Carrie Harris > Quotes

“Jonah squealed, jumping up and down and shaking his pom-poms. His skirt swished around his scrawny yellow knees.
“Jonah, can I give you a piece of sisterly advice?”
“Yeah.”
“If you ever want to lose your virginity, don’t do that again. Ever.”
― Carrie Harris, Bad Taste in Boys

“I stumbled into a clearing. In the springtime, it was probably the kind of place you’d like to hang out with sparkly vampires. But it was slightly less attractive in the rain.”
― Carrie Harris, Bad Taste in Boys

“What kind of emergency?”
“Uh …”
“Gynecology or acupuncture?”
What the heck would an acupuncture-related emergency be like?”
― Carrie Harris, Bad Taste in Boys

“Excuse me if I feel skeptical,' I said. 'Coach's foot fell off. How exactly do you propose to cure that? Superglue?”
― Carrie Harris, Bad Taste in Boys

“Everyone in the room stared at me like they expected me to grow fangs and sparkle.”
― Carrie Harris, Bad Taste in Boys

“I'm going to go hunt some zombie," he said. It would have sounded pretty cool if his voice hadn't cracked in the middle of the sentence.”
― Carrie Harris, Bad Taste in Boys

“So I started running through our weaponry to distract myself. I had my stun gun. Jonah had a pseudosword, and Aaron had a really cute butt. Not that his butt would be useful in de-botting Trey, but it's always good to have a full catalog of your strengths before going into battle.”
― Carrie Harris, Bad Hair Day

“I wanted to beat the heck out of the JV guys for that, except I wouldn't know what to do in a fistfight without a manual.”
― Carrie Harris, Bad Taste in Boys

“Are these Romero slow zombies, or 28 Days Later fast zombies?”
“They were totally slow, dude. Are you blind?”
― Carrie Harris, Bad Taste in Boys

“After a quick meltdown in the bathroom, I went downstairs. When I turned the corner at the bottom of the basement steps, Jonah lept at me, waving a plastic bag in my face.
I'd never been so happy to see a Country Market bag in my life.”
― Carrie Harris, Bad Taste in Boys

“That puke was the most wonderful thing I'd ever seen. It was green and a little red. Technicolor, really, the color puke is supposed to be. It definitely wasn't black, and it didn't smell like toasty poop. This was a good sign.”
― Carrie Harris, Bad Taste in Boys

“It probably wasn't smart to judge them based on appearance. I, for instance, was destined to be a world-renowned surgeon, but between my long, brown braid, square-framed glasses, and boyish figure, I looked more like the kind of girl who works in a library and spends Friday nights having deep, meaningful conversations with her cats.”
― Carrie Harris, Bad Hair Day

“Kate, you better take those sausages off the grill," Kiki said from the toast and juice station, "I think they're burning." I didn't want to tell her it was the scent of fried hand.”
― Carrie Harris, Bad Taste in Boys

“I hit my bedroom wall with a sickening crunch. Strangely it didn't hurt.”
― Carrie Harris, Bad Hair Day