Dave Stone > Quotes

“It's been going on for days now! On and on and on for days! If I hear one more sexual-chemistry-charged and mutually misunderstood argument I'm going to shoot the pair of you!”
― Dave Stone, Doctor Who: Death and Diplomacy

“All of which is to the purpose that I have travelled more than most, by means that provoke looks of askance at the merest telling of them,”
― Dave Stone, The Slow Empire

“D AVE STONE is a notorious and unconscionably indolent slug-a-bed with little or no achievement of merit to his name.”
― Dave Stone, The Slow Empire

“That was when I knew him before, you understand, when he could just pull stuff like that out of his, uh, hat.”
― Dave Stone, The Slow Empire

“Now, as to what he’s doing, let me say that the Doctor is at practice of the art of, ah, Pratantimancy – a discipline, you know, of his people.”
― Dave Stone, The Slow Empire

“There was a vaguely battered look to the outside of the TARDIS herself, but she seemed basically whole and intact. The main door (which the Doctor could quite distinctly remember not closing, being far more interested in putting some distance between himself and his young companions and the assortment of monstrous creatures spilling out of it) was now firmly shut, with the sense that it would take rather more than simple cajolery for it ever to open again.”
― Dave Stone, The Slow Empire

“This was currently that magic point in the cycle before
the party broke apart spectacularly into mass violence. The social mechanisms that inhibited Sereans en masse from the more extreme forms of enjoying themselves were gone -and next, catastrophically, would go the last vestigial mechanisms
that restrained them from wholesale assault and murder. For pleasure and hatred, and revenge, and for the hell of it and then, when the food at last ran out, for bare survival.”
― Dave Stone, Doctor Who: Sky Pirates!

“So if you’re reading this, and you know me, and I’m not dead yet, could you please come and rescue me?”
― Dave Stone, The Mary-Sue Extrusion: A Pandora Delbane Adventure

“You’ve left things better than you found them, and that’s pretty much all that anybody can hope for.”
― Dave Stone, The Slow Empire

“The chaos of events in the Inner Court still raged in her mind, like one of those fever dreams where image upon disjointed image pile up before the mind’s eye in a nauseating, strobing mass that doesn’t even have the saving grace of dream logic.”
― Dave Stone, The Slow Empire

“Take cover!’ the Doctor shouted frantically. He looked wildly about himself, realised that there was nothing in the Chamber of Souls actually to take cover under or behind, and shouted again: ‘Get out! Get out!’ Fitz”
― Dave Stone, The Slow Empire

“from the barracks burst bandsmen in their hundreds. Each was armed, as I had seen before, but now some were quite more armed than others.”
― Dave Stone, The Slow Empire

“Can't have someone mucking around behind the scenes like that. Manipulating people and manoeuvring them into the right place at the right time. Next thing we know, we'll have a pyrotic in a big skin balloon full of methane, just when it needs to be exploded or something. Can't have something like that, right?”
― Dave Stone, Doctor Who: Sky Pirates!

“Excrescent hominids will now cower before my Most Supreme ejaculations!”
― Dave Stone, Doctor Who: Sky Pirates!

“Are you all right?’ Fitz had asked him. ‘I mean, it’s not just that you’re going mad on us, it’s like you’re going mad on us in different ways, like different people are doing it. .”
― Dave Stone, The Slow Empire

“Once, in the time when musical recordings were commonly sold on vinyl, an advertising agency decided to market some product or other by way of a 45-r.p.m. single cover-mounted on a magazine. This being an advertising agency, of course, the first point of business was that they all sit around in a room and discuss what colour it should be.”
― Dave Stone, The Slow Empire

“Beside this, almost incidentally, she noticed a large
wooden tub, fixed to the floor with ichor and covered with tarpaulin.
The leech-thing rotated in the air to regard her. 'Most Supreme Captain will ejaculate now.'
The monstrosity opened its grinning mouth.”
― Dave Stone, Doctor Who: Sky Pirates!

“It must have been quite terrible for you, my dear,’ I said, giving her a companionable and comforting pat on the head.”
― Dave Stone, The Slow Empire

“In more than one case I saw a glockenspiel fully half the length again of the bandsman carrying it – although the particular offensive capabilities of such an instrument were at that time well nigh impossible to guess. For”
― Dave Stone, The Slow Empire

“As a novel, of course, the whole thing blows dead rodents somewhat more so than a dead-rodent blowing thing. What the hell do I know about writing novels? I have enough trouble dealing with all the shit that happens in real life. I”
― Dave Stone, The Mary-Sue Extrusion: A Pandora Delbane Adventure

“This was currently that magic point in the cycle before
the party broke apart spectacularly into mass violence. The social mechanisms that inhibited Sereans en masse from the more extreme forms of enjoying themselves were gone -and next, catastrophically, would go the last vestigial mechanisms
that restrained them from wholesale assault and murder. For pleasure and hatred, and revenge, and for the hell of it and then, when the food at last ran out, for bare survival.”
― Dave Stone

“The thing that worries me,' Benny said, 'is that I can feel myself starting to think the same way. Becoming one-dimensional. Playing the part that was slotted for me.' She looked at the Time Lord, suddenly, sharply. 'How much of that are you doing? Suppressing this and emphasizing that and greasing the other along? Making us fit in where we don't really belong?”
― Dave Stone, Doctor Who: Sky Pirates!

“So what happened to the Emperor, then?’ said the Doctor, in the tones of one knowing very well what had happened to the Emperor, and indeed Emperors.”
― Dave Stone, The Slow Empire

“Prometheus had stolen fire from the gods (from Hephaistos’s forge itself, as it happens) to make the lives of mortals better, so with a masterful bit of prototypical game-theory, Zeus set up a scenario that would, metaphorically, blow up in everybody’s faces and make life that much worse.”
― Dave Stone, The Mary-Sue Extrusion: A Pandora Delbane Adventure

“Of course, discretion being the better part of valour, for the moment we might be better off heroically running away.’ A”
― Dave Stone, The Slow Empire

“For a moment he considered making a break for it – but in the end it is physically impossible for something the size and shape of a human to go up a spiral staircase over a certain speed. Besides, he had no idea what might be at the top – and he could instantly think of seven thousand, four hundred and thirty-two things that might be simply and instantly lethal.”
― Dave Stone, The Slow Empire

“Well, this is all very Hundred and Twenty Days of Sodom,’ said the Doctor. ‘It reminds me of the Court of Caligula on the days when they let school parties in.’ ‘You”
― Dave Stone, The Slow Empire

“Oh what foul traitor in your midst could have called such a pestilence down upon the very, er, Shakrathly presence of his own beloved Emperor! For shame!”
― Dave Stone, The Slow Empire

“the Doctor said, as if he hadn’t heard, ‘but the fact remains that if we attempt to push things too far we might end up disappearing up our own singularity and, probably, take this entire section of the universe with us. And I think we’ve all had quite enough of that for a while.”
― Dave Stone, The Slow Empire

“And then things happened quickly. Too quickly, on so many wildly differing scales, for any single observer ever to fully comprehend them. And not necessarily in the entirely correct order, besides. . . In”
― Dave Stone, The Slow Empire