Barry M. Prizant > Quotes

“Difficulty staying well regulated emotionally and physiologically should be a core, defining feature of autism. Unfortunately professionals have long overlooked this, focusing on the resulting behaviors instead of the underlying causes.”
― Barry M. Prizant, Uniquely Human: A Different Way of Seeing Autism

“But discouraging an enthusiasm can be just another way of dismantling a strategy that helps a child with autism feel better regulated—or, worse, removing a source of interest and joy.”
― Barry M. Prizant, Uniquely Human: A Different Way of Seeing Autism

“Derek’s reaction highlights a central challenge of autism: for the vast majority of people on the spectrum, autism can be best understood as a disability of trust. Because of their neurological challenges, people with autism face tremendous obstacles of three kinds: trusting their body, trusting the world around them, and—most challenging of all—trusting other people.”
― Barry M. Prizant, Uniquely Human: A Different Way of Seeing Autism

“Her moment of restraint was emblematic of an important idea: Instead of trying to change how a person with autism reacts to us, we need to pay close attention to how we react to the person.”
― Barry M. Prizant, Uniquely Human: A Different Way of Seeing Autism

“Still, some parents and professionals view these interests as yet another undesirable symptom of autism, one that makes it even more difficult for the child to fit in. Often their instinct is to discourage the child, to redirect his attention and suggest interests that are more socially acceptable and conventional. But discouraging an enthusiasm can be just another way of dismantling a strategy that helps a child with autism feel better regulated—or, worse, removing a source of interest and joy. A more helpful approach is to do as Jessy Park’s parents did and use the enthusiasm as a way to expand the child’s outlook and improve the child’s life.”
― Barry M. Prizant, Uniquely Human: A Different Way of Seeing Autism

“Indeed many children with autism regulate themselves by trying to control their surroundings—by seeking sameness. That isn’t a pathological symptom. It’s a coping strategy.”
― Barry M. Prizant, Uniquely Human: A Different Way of Seeing Autism

“The most significant trust-related challenge for people with autism is trusting other people. Most of us are neurologically hardwired with the ability to predict the behavior of others—to read body language intuitively and make subconscious judgments based on how relaxed a person’s body is, on how a person looks at other people, or by the social context. But that is often more difficult for people with autism. Ros Blackburn explains that she lives every day trying to understand people’s intentions when they approach her. “Because I find it so difficult to predict the behavior of other people,” Ros explains, “what they do often comes across as very sudden and threatening to me.”
― Barry M. Prizant, Uniquely Human: A Different Way of Seeing Autism

“Autism isn’t an illness. It’s a different way of being human.”
― Barry M. Prizant, Uniquely Human: A Different Way of Seeing Autism

“The opposite of anxiety isn’t calm, it’s trust.”
― Barry M. Prizant, Uniquely Human: A Different Way of Seeing Autism

“Some people with autism not only repeat themselves but dominate conversations, sharing great amounts of information about a favorite topic (say, geography or trains) without considering the other person’s thoughts, feelings, or interests. This too can be a sign of dysregulation. For a person with a poor grasp of social cues who finds the unpredictability of typical conversation stressful, speaking incessantly on a familiar and beloved topic might provide a sense of control.”
― Barry M. Prizant, Uniquely Human: A Different Way of Seeing Autism

“Instead of trying to change how a person with autism reacts to us, we need to pay close attention to how we react to the person.”
― Barry M. Prizant, Uniquely Human: A Different Way of Seeing Autism

“Allen had an aide who hovered within inches of his face and physically prompted him so frequently that her very proximity became a dysregulating factor. As time passed, Allen became more and more agitated—mostly because of the aide’s behavior. Some adults who work with children have the misguided concept that to be effective, it’s best to be in the child’s face, even to give positive support. But for a child with autism who has social anxiety and sensory challenges, that can be scary and intimidating. It can also impede progress.”
― Barry M. Prizant, Uniquely Human: A Different Way of Seeing Autism

“While a 2013 study found that, over time, a very small percentage of children experienced such improvements in symptoms that they no longer fit the DSM autism diagnosis, the study found no way to predict which children would show such gains, or why.”
― Barry M. Prizant, Uniquely Human: A Different Way of Seeing Autism

“Anyone who has spent time with a verbal person with autism is familiar with this tendency to repeat words, phrases, or whole sentences, often ad infinitum. Indeed echolalia is one of autism’s defining characteristics. In children who can speak it is often among the first indications to parents that something is amiss in a child, when, instead of responding or initiating with the child’s own language, the child echoes words or phrases borrowed from others.”
― Barry M. Prizant, Uniquely Human: A Different Way of Seeing Autism

“Many people with autism find it helpful to bring a toy or other item or an activity related to an enthusiasm to settings that may pose difficulties, such as restaurants, family events, or larger group activities at school.”
― Barry M. Prizant, Uniquely Human: A Different Way of Seeing Autism

“Consider Ricky, a teenage boy with autism who was a talented pianist. Ricky once volunteered to entertain the residents of an assisted-living center. He had never visited such a facility, but his parents told him what a lovely, caring gesture it would be. They also informed him that some of the elderly people he would see had terminal illnesses and other challenges, so surely his music would help to lift their spirits. On the day of his performance, a few dozen residents gathered in a recreation room to listen. Before he sat down to play, Ricky introduced himself, said how happy he was to be there, and added this: “I’m very sorry that some of you are going to die soon.”
― Barry M. Prizant, Uniquely Human: A Different Way of Seeing Autism

“Seeking to eliminate behavior without fully understanding its purpose is not only unhelpful; it also shows a lack of respect for the individual. Worse, it can make life more difficult for the person with autism.”
― Barry M. Prizant, Uniquely Human: A Different Way of Seeing Autism

“Many parents look to doctors or therapists to be the experts, appealing to them to explain their children. Over time I have come to realize that the best approaches to providing effective and meaningful support for autistic children and adults center on the family, and those close to the family. Parents almost always know their children better than anyone else does. Adult siblings and grandparents often have a great depth of understanding about the autistic person with whom they have shared so much of their life.”
― Barry M. Prizant, Uniquely Human: A Different Way of Seeing Autism

“Being in a low state of arousal is like walking around in a nonfocused, drowsy condition. Professionals refer to these individuals as having a “low arousal bias.” Because they display fewer problem behaviors, they appear to be better regulated and are often thought of as being “good kids” or “not a problem” because they appear so well-behaved. Does that mean they don’t experience anxiety? Not necessarily. When they feel dysregulated, these individuals tend to internalize their anxiety rather than directing their behavior outward. The anxious feelings build over time, with few observable, or only very subtle, signs of anxiety or dysregulation, so outbursts or meltdowns can be difficult to predict.”
― Barry M. Prizant, Uniquely Human: A Different Way of Seeing Autism

“is a mecca of autism services.”
― Barry M. Prizant, Uniquely Human: A Different Way of Seeing Autism - Revised and Expanded

“Close family members can feel desperate to find a way to help the person to control the impulse to focus too much on a topic or interest. They worry that it accentuates how different the individual appears to peers. Some family members and others close to the person might be tired of hearing about the same themes over and over again. Many times I have heard the most patient of parents finally say, “We just need him to stop.” The problem with that response is that it focuses on the behavior without asking what is motivating it.”
― Barry M. Prizant, Uniquely Human: A Different Way of Seeing Autism

“When parents ask me to explain their child’s habit of repeating phrases and words (or any perplexing pattern of behavior), my first response is always to turn the question around: “Well, what do you think?” Usually they can tell me—or at least make an educated guess. In either case they often provide important information about their child that I was not aware of, and in the process their expertise about their child is validated—they feel respected and valued as a member of a collaborative partnership”
― Barry M. Prizant, Uniquely Human: A Different Way of Seeing Autism

“These deep interests can help children stay more engaged and attentive. They can be used to motivate learning and to enable participation in situations that might otherwise be difficult.”
― Barry M. Prizant, Uniquely Human: A Different Way of Seeing Autism

“Brain research shows that the brain processes emotional memories in the amygdala, part of the limbic system that is responsible for functions of memory and emotion. Situations that remind a person of traumatic events can trigger the release of stress hormones. This overactivates the amygdala, which sets off the release of still more of the hormones. The result: severe emotional distress in the form of racing thoughts, anger, and hypervigilance beyond a person’s control or even conscious awareness.”
― Barry M. Prizant, Uniquely Human: A Different Way of Seeing Autism

“In the words of the autistic author Paul Collins, “Autists are the ultimate square pegs, and the problem with pounding a square peg into a round hole is not that the hammering is hard work. It’s that you are destroying the peg.”
― Barry M. Prizant, Uniquely Human: A Different Way of Seeing Autism

“for the vast majority of people on the spectrum, autism can be best understood as a disability of trust. Because of their neurological challenges, autistic people face tremendous obstacles of three kinds: trusting their body, trusting the world around them, and—most challenging of all—trusting other people.”
― Barry M. Prizant, Uniquely Human: A Different Way of Seeing Autism

“Thanks to the insights and advocacy of many autistic adults, we now understand that stims often serve a self-regulatory function, helping a person feel grounded when the sensory environment is overwhelming, or when they feel anxious, afraid, or even bored. Or one might stim because it is enjoyable, fun, and creative.”
― Barry M. Prizant, Uniquely Human: A Different Way of Seeing Autism

“For an autistic person, social interactions can provoke anxiety and confusion because they have no fixed structure and one can’t always predict what another person will say. So an autistic person will try to create predictability and comfort in conversation by limiting the topics to areas in which he has mastery. When a child or teenager needs help developing or refining conversational skills, groups focusing on social understanding and related social competencies can provide help, offering a safe and supportive space in which to gain awareness of how to negotiate a conversation and listen to and show interest in others. Instead of reprimanding a child and damaging her self-esteem, it’s preferable to offer more positive options, such as activities or games that provide opportunities to practice conversational skills or role-playing everyday interactions in a manner that is enjoyable for all involved.”
― Barry M. Prizant, Uniquely Human: A Different Way of Seeing Autism

“But his behavior made sense: on a very primal level, he was trying to stay safe. To help him, I suggested that his teacher give Jeremy a sense of control by spending time with pretend, paper butterflies, allowing them to “fly” close and then having Jeremy wave them off, saying, “Bye-bye butterflies!” He also spent time looking through books about butterflies to understand that they are harmless. This reframing over time helped him overcome his anxiety.”
― Barry M. Prizant, Uniquely Human: A Different Way of Seeing Autism

“Because of their neurological challenges, people with autism face tremendous obstacles of three kinds: trusting their body, trusting the world around them, and—most challenging of all—trusting other people.”
― Barry M. Prizant, Uniquely Human: A Different Way of Seeing Autism