John Corwin > Quotes

“Bryan helped me up.  "How can you be so good one minute then clumsy the next?"
I shrugged.  "I've never been very athletic.  Not unless you count fencing."
"You made fences?”
― John Corwin, Sweet Blood of Mine

“Wait, so you do love me?" I asked, hope welling in my heart.
She growled and pounded her fist into a locker, leaving a fist-shaped dent. "Stop it, Justin. Stop it!"
I grabbed her shoulders. "Look at me and tell me you don't love me," I said. "Do it and I'll never bother you again."
"I don't love you," she mumbled.
"Look at me when you say it!"
She turned to me, her eyes hard but dull and faded. "I don't love you."
I let her go. My heart turned to lead, the heavy lump sagging in my chest. "Well, if there are agents out there looking to kill me, I guess it would be a mercy."
I turned to leave. Her hand gripped my shoulder.
"Please listen to me, Justin."
I pushed her hand away but didn't turn to face her. I couldn't let her see the tears welling in my eyes. "Why? What does it matter?"
"It just does. I—I don't want to see you hurt."
I took a deep shuddering breath. "You're not doing a very good job of it." I walked away and left her standing there.”
― John Corwin, Sweet Blood of Mine

“I wanted to find a nice quiet spot, go to sleep, and dream about kittens.”
― John Corwin, Dark Light of Mine

“Even though the place looked like Kansas, I didn´t need to tell Toto that my Facebook Places status wasnñt anywhere on the planet Earth, much less Kansas.”
― John Corwin, The Next Thing I Knew

“Apparently alcohol increases charm and courage by at least ten points.”
― John Corwin, Sweet Blood of Mine

“Nothing could make me pull away meat-market love goddess. My sexy little filet mignon”
― John Corwin, Sweet Blood of Mine

“I felt a smile on my face. "Thanks." "For what?" "Using my name instead of calling me a thing.”
― John Corwin, Dark Light of Mine

“I tried to beat the crap out of someone's fist with my face”
― John Corwin, Sweet Blood of Mine

“Despite the weight of the world on my shoulders, the temptation to stop and smell the supernatural roses tugged on my sleeves a time or two.”
― John Corwin, Dark Light of Mine

“What was it about women and crying that made me feel like crap? They must have guilt pheromones in their tears.”
― John Corwin, Dark Light of Mine

“You let your mind rule your reality instead of you ruling your mind."
"Are you reading this stuff out of a Dr. Phil book?”
― John Corwin, The Next Thing I Knew

“Tight dump on three" he said... "I have to drop a deuce on the count of three?”
― John Corwin, Sweet Blood of Mine

“I might be short, chubby, and require a B-cup manzier, but I was still a man.”
― John Corwin, Sweet Blood of Mine

“I probably looked like an infuriated chipmunk.”
― John Corwin, Sweet Blood of Mine

“Everything occurred in phases. The "Holy Crap, We're Dead!" phase was marked by mass hysteria. Mass euphoria resulted from the "Holy Crap, We're Free of Life's Burdens!" phase. Now things had shifted into the "Holy Crap, We Can Do Whatever We Want!" phase in which mass indulgence made the ancient Romans look like teetotalers.”
― John Corwin, The Next Thing I Knew

“My eyelids felt like had tiny but chubby sleep faeries hanging on the lashes and pulling them closed”
― John Corwin, Sweet Blood of Mine

“I´d use Google to find out, but seem to have misplaced my house along with my laptop”
― John Corwin, The Next Thing I Knew

“Better check your pants, Kyle. I think you had a nerdgasm.”
― John Corwin, The Next Thing I Knew

“No wonder Edward was such a crazy driver," I muttered. "Who's Edward?" Elyssa asked. "You know, from Twilight.”
― John Corwin, Dark Light of Mine

“Those are Klingon and Federation ships," I said. "You're a nerd, Shelton, but, holy crap, do I love this.”
― John Corwin, Dark Light of Mine

“I was falling for Elyssa and my track record with girls looked like a zombie apocalypse.”
― John Corwin, Sweet Blood of Mine

“I looked at her like I'd just seen a miniature Elvis break-dancing on her head.”
― John Corwin, Dark Light of Mine

“Can I finish my blasted story? We'll get to supernatural kindergarten later.”
― John Corwin, Dark Light of Mine

“This is not good," I said. "These guys have a superiority complex bigger than Miss Compton's butt."
"And she had the biggest butt of them all," Kyle said.”
― John Corwin, The Next Thing I Knew

“What the hell is wrong with me? And who is Nibbles?”
― John Corwin, The Next Thing I Knew

“Harb was a ticking time bomb. It was like watching a preacher with Tourette syndrome. You knew the "Shit! Balls!" was coming at some point during the sermon, probably while he was slapping you on the forehead during a faith healing.”
― John Corwin, The Next Thing I Knew

“The girl might be gorgeous under normal circumstances, but she was an ugly crier.”
― John Corwin, Sweet Blood of Mine

“Does this mean Harry Potter really exists?”
― John Corwin, Dark Light of Mine

“Ready for your first lesson, cupcake?”
― John Corwin, Dark Light of Mine

“Great. I guess you're the dog whisperer, vampire edition.”
― John Corwin, Dark Light of Mine