Zachry Wheeler > Quotes

“Happiness isn’t tangible. It’s a blind chase down a dark road. Contentment, on the other hand, is real. It’s a solid state of mind. It’s like landing on a pillow instead of floating through the clouds.”
― Zachry Wheeler, Starship Eternity: A Sci-Fi Horror Short

“Fate, always clever despite its nonexistence,”
― Zachry Wheeler, Max and the Multiverse Box Set

“Evolution is the improv comedian of the natural world. It just rolls out mutations and hopes for the best, like a blind man playing darts. Its shtick may receive praise, ridicule, or slack-jawed confusion.”
― Zachry Wheeler, Max and the Snoodlecock

“After all, morons hinder progress (and for the record, no truer statement has ever been uttered). And since stupid breeds like coked-up rabbits, it often mounts a devastating opposition.”
― Zachry Wheeler, Max and the Multiverse

“Korogar ranked third for the worst food in the Virgo Supercluster, just behind England and the Death Pits of Goromesh.”
― Zachry Wheeler, Max and the Multiverse Box Set

“Computer, re-acquire target lock.” “Unable,” the computer said, using the monotone voice of an 80’s era robot. “Why not?” “Range.” “Huh? What about range?” “Out.” “What about missile lock?” “Unable.” “Why not?” “Terrain.” Trevor huffed. “Okay, what else we got?” “Stuff.” “What kind of stuff?” “Snacks.”
― Zachry Wheeler, Max and the Multiverse Box Set

“Oh c’mon mate, lighten up. Most people slog through life without ever knowing the wonders of true insanity. I say enjoy the pink elephants while you got ‘em.”
― Zachry Wheeler, Max and the Multiverse Box Set

“Life is a never-ending game of attrition. Our wits, swords. Our composure, shields.”
― Zachry Wheeler, Max and the Multiverse

“As a nervy bunch of insecure know-it-alls, academics always felt a burning need to one-up their competition. This phenomenon stemmed from a paradoxical anxiety shared across the spectrum. On one hand, a constant fear exclaimed I’m a total fraud. But on the other hand, a bitter frustration exclaimed I’m smarter than this idiot. When felt in tandem, they forced otherwise harmless nerds to berate each other in a concert setting.”
― Zachry Wheeler, Max and the Snoodlecock

“The ceiling and rear wall disappeared, exposing the external vista of a massive spiral galaxy, its brilliant arms of blue and purple surrounding a giant ball of white light in the center. The collective brilliance of a trillion stars filled the tiny room. Max yelped, leapt out of the bed, and pressed his back against the door. “You’re perfectly fine, mate,” Ross said with a hearty chuckle. “Calm the bloody hell down. The wall and ceiling are still there, just reflecting the external view. Neat, huh?”
― Zachry Wheeler, Max and the Multiverse

“Last time I was in Houston, it smelled like the sweaty crotch of a sumo wrestler.”
― Zachry Wheeler, Max and the Multiverse