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“But, I’m-I’m your mother!” she cried. “And I’m a motherfucker,” Rock grumbled”
Aron Beauregard, Playground
“The wheels were turning in all their heads, but the one with the dead hamster inside spoke first.”
Aron Beauregard, Playground
“Monsters are real, and they don’t look quite like the supernatural depictions on the silver screen. They look just like you and me.”
Aron Beauregard, Son of the Slob
“He wanted attention, but not that way. He wanted to be held, but not that way. He wanted to be loved, but not that way. Geraldine had turned him into the saddest kind of damaged goods. The kind that’s too fucked-up to realize it. When horror isn’t quite horror anymore, it’s just normal. And when awful isn’t quite awful anymore, it’s just life.”
Aron Beauregard, Playground
“When horror isn’t quite horror anymore, it’s just normal. And when awful isn’t quite awful anymore, it’s just life.”
Aron Beauregard, Playground
“Greg turned around, shooting laser beams through the most disappointing sperm he’d ever unleashed.”
Aron Beauregard, Playground
“Greg turned around, shooting laser beams though the most disappointing sperm he’d ever unleashed.”
Aron Beauregard, Playground
“A fresh teardrop pissed out of his eye duct.”
Aron Beauregard, Playground
“He wanted attention, but not that way. He wanted to be held, but not that way. He wanted to be loved, but not that way.”
Aron Beauregard, Playground
“For those once youthful spirits that have now grown old and cracked, but still remember the carefree days when we took to the playground on a hot summer’s day with our minds unshackled. When our innocent friends played beside us with beaming smiles as bright as the sun, and the many problems of life weren’t for us to deal with yet. For the days that felt like they would last forever…”
Aron Beauregard, Playground
“It was as if the playground amplified the absolute best or worst traits of the children imprisoned within it.”
Aron Beauregard, Playground
“In retrospect, all the signs were there. I just gave him (and the world)
too much credit I suppose. I thought projecting my good intentions onto
others would act as a safeguard. But benevolence, charm, and charity will
be of little help once you fall into the clutches of a heartless heathen.
- Vera”
Aron Beauregard, The Slob
“If the walls could talk, they probably wouldn’t. They’d probably just scream.”
Aron Beauregard, Son of the Slob
“But that was life, sometimes you had to laugh, otherwise, you’d only cry.”
Aron Beauregard, The Slob
“She pulled her moist panties down, allowing her fermented beaver to peek out from below.”
Aron Beauregard, Playground
“Rock’s buttocks could sense the vomit and bile that was bubbling up from Greg’s gut.”
Aron Beauregard, Playground
“Terror in itself is a helpless feeling that is usually injected immediately into our systems. Almost like it's just sitting dormant, filling a needle that is already poking into our veins. It's waiting for the perfect moment for the plunger to be pushed.”
Aron Beauregard, The Slob
“the half-hearted blow sent me flying on my ass into the human gumbo below”
Aron Beauregard, The Slob
“WARNING: This book contains scenes and subject matter that are disgusting and disturbing; easily offended people are not the intended audience.”
Aron Beauregard, Playground
“The torso and limbs had been divided up like pizza in a first-grade math problem. Each piece was skin-free, except for the hands and feet. The rest of the exterior casing had been ripped off and stacked up by itself right behind her head.”
Aron Beauregard, The Slob
“The undeniable appalling comprehension that death couldn’t be spellbound and contorted to appease her. There was no way to tame or beckon it with total accuracy”
Aron Beauregard, The Slob
“I thought projecting my good intentions onto others would act as a safeguard. But benevolence, charm, and charity will be of little help once you fall into the clutches of a heartless heathen.”
Aron Beauregard, The Slob
“We never valued our quality-of-life based on what was around us, only who was around us.”
Aron Beauregard, The Slob
“i shall determine if they deserve this existence. i shall determine if they are worthy of avoiding the ghastliest of fates.”
Aron Beauregard, Playground: Child of Divorce
“At just seven years old, Sadie’s name rang closer to her personality. She was a psychological sadist.”
Aron Beauregard, Playground
“Geraldine wasn’t upset her mother wasn’t riding her father’s face. She was upset she wasn’t riding hers.”
Aron Beauregard, Playground
“It was in that blissful instant that he’d completely fallen for me. It was the day that I felt like I finally became whole.”
Aron Beauregard, The Slob
“You’re mine, remember?” she whispered seductively”
Aron Beauregard, Playground
“She rode the rubber like an eager porn star as saliva seeped from her mouth.”
Aron Beauregard, Playground
“In retrospect, all the signs were there. I just gave him (and the world) too much credit I suppose. I thought projecting my good intentions onto others would act as a safeguard. But benevolence, charm, and charity will be of little help once you fall into the clutches of a heartless heathen.”
Aron Beauregard, The Slob

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Aron Beauregard
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