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“I don’t think our next-door neighbour is very happy about our mini farm. Mr Tugg is always complaining. Dad and Mr Tugg don’t get on very well, especially since Granny ran off with Mr Tugg’s dad. She did and, yes, Lancelot is Mr Tugg’s dad. They eloped in a hot-air balloon and got married. I mean – she’s sixty-five, and Lancelot is even older! Mr Tugg is quite short and he’s almost bald except for a little bristly moustache that wriggles like a caterpillar when he’s cross. He has a kind of warning system for when he’s angry (which is often). First he goes red, then deep red, then purple and finally he turns white-hot. It’s very impressive,”
― My Brother's Famous Bottom
― My Brother's Famous Bottom
“It made me feel that bad things could happen but they didn’t have to stay bad. Sometimes they could get better, with a bit of help.”
― Beware! Killer Tomatoes
― Beware! Killer Tomatoes
“Granny’s eyes popped. ‘You’ve got rabies? Oh dear.’ She reached across the table and patted Mum’s arm. ‘Never mind, I’ve got some nice handcream upstairs.”
― My Mum's Going to Explode!
― My Mum's Going to Explode!
“have you got an idea for a Big Plan?’ asked Mum. Dad smiled triumphantly. ‘I have. In fact I have thought of several ways we can either make money, or save money.’ No wonder Mum looked worried. Dad’s plans for anything usually lead to trouble. ‘OK,’ he announced. ‘Here is my first idea for making money: we sell the twins.’ ‘You can’t sell Cheese and To– I mean, James and Rebecca!’ protested Mum. ‘It’s only a suggestion,’ said Dad hastily. ‘Don’t get your knickers in a twist. I can see you don’t like that plan and I’m not very fond of it either, so here is my second idea: we sell Nicholas.’ ‘Dad!’ I yelled. ‘You don’t like that either? OK, quieten down. You’ll love this next one, I promise. Idea number three: we sell Granny.”
― My Brother's Famous Bottom
― My Brother's Famous Bottom
“can be very ungreat. ‘And before you do any digging you can change the babies’ nappies,’ smiled Mum. ‘Thank you,’ I scowled. ‘I’m just your slave really, aren’t I?’ ‘Yes,’ they answered. I turned round to find the twins and of course they’d vanished, hadn’t they? They’re always”
― My Brother's Famous Bottom
― My Brother's Famous Bottom
“ghouls. I’m going to make films with”
― Krazy Kow Saves the World - Well, Almost
― Krazy Kow Saves the World - Well, Almost
“says”
― My Brother's Famous Bottom
― My Brother's Famous Bottom




