Hank Moody > Quotes

“people seem to be getting dumber and dumber. You know, I mean we have all this amazing technology and yet computers have turned into basically four figure wank machines. The internet was supposed to set us free, democratize us, but all it's really given us is Howard Dean's aborted candidacy and 24 hour a day access to kiddie porn. People... they don't write anymore, they blog. Instead of talking, they text, no punctuation, no grammar: LOL this and LMFAO that. You know, it just seems to me it's just a bunch of stupid people pseudo-communicating with a bunch of other stupid people at a proto-language that resembles more what cavemen used to speak than the King's English.”
― Hank Moody

“You know why love stories have happy endings?” I shake my head.
“Because they end too early,” she continues. “They always end right at the kiss. You never have to see all the bullshit that comes later. You know, Life.”
― Hank Moody, God Hates Us All

“She said one thing and I said another and the next thing I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life in the middle of that conversation.”
― Hank Moody

“A morning of awkwardness is far better then a night of loneliness”
― Hank Moody

“Good morning, Hell-A. In the land of the lotus-eaters, time plays tricks on you. One day you’re dreaming, the next, your dream has become your reality. It was the best of times. If only someone had told me. Mistakes were made, hearts were broken, harsh lessons learned. My family goes on without me, while I drown in a sea of pointless pussy. I don’t know how I got here. But here I am, rotting away in the warm California sun. There are things I need to figure out, for her sake, at least. The clock is ticking. The gap is widening. She won’t always love me “no matter what”
― Hank Moody

“When it comes to emotions, women know how to paint with the full set of oils, while men are busy doodling with crayons.”
― Hank Moody, God Hates Us All

“The person that I want to have everything to do with, wants nothing to do with me.”
― Hank Moody

“Don’t tell me what to feel. All my fucking life, people have been telling me I do things wrong. I’m always the fucking asshole. I look around and I see everybody else is infinitely more fucked up than I am.”
― Hank Moody

“Dear Karen,

I've been thinking about Us, the story of us. How the fuck do I sum it up? Has it been perfect? Hardly. Any story with me at the center of it will never be anything less than a big smiling mess. But here's what I know for sure—our time in the sun has been a thing of absolute fucking beauty. The nightmares, the hangovers, the fucking and the punching. The gorgeous shimmering insanity of the city of ours. Where for years I woke up, fucked up, said I was sorry, passed out and did it all over again.

As a writer, I'm a sucker for happy endings. The guy gets the girl, she saves him from himself, fade to fucking black. As a guy who loves a girl, I realize there's no such thing. There's no sunset. There's just now, and there's just the two of us, which can be scary fucking ugly sometimes. But if you close your eyes and listen for the whisper of your heart—if you simply keep trying and never ever give up, no matter how many times you get it wrong, until the beginning and the end blur into something called until we meet again -- and that's it.

I didn't know how to finish it, because it's not over. It'll never be over, as longs as there's you, and there's me, and there's hope, and grace.”
― Hank Moody

“Get it in while you can. It'll all be gone soon enough.”
― Hank Moody, God Hates Us All

“Whatever you do, don’t be another brick in the wall!”
― Hank Moody

“How can you be so fucking beautiful and so fucking wrong?”
― Hank Moody

“All those things that werent supposed to happen? They happened. What happens next is up to you.”
― Hank Moody

“I’ve lost a lot of battles, but I’ve never lost sight of the war. My goal is to fight my way to a day when we’re old and gray and she looks at me and says ‘I’m glad you never gave up.’ Until then, I fight. No retreat, baby. No surrender.”
― Hank Moody

“I pop a cassette into the Buick's stereo. It's the Ramones. I turn the volume up high and roll down the windows. The highway air tastes of fumes, but it still feels goddamn good to breathe”
― Hank Moody, God Hates Us All

“I don’t just say shit. I mean, I do talk a lot of shit, but I generally mean what I say and I say what I mean.”
― Hank Moody

“I don’t think that’s it. I think everybody’s got that special someone that gets under their skin and doesn’t go away. I think maybe you have that particular fungal property for him.”
― Hank Moody

“Maybe we're all out there, floating by ourselves in some big black void. But we build connections, you know? We build our own worlds with the people we love.”
― Hank Moody, God Hates Us All

“Cities don’t change people. People don’t even change people. We are who we are.”
― Hank Moody

“That was not sex. That was naked poetry.”
― Hank Moody

“I google myself but I never cheated on you. Never.”
― Hank Moody

“You’re right. You should probably do your best not to fall in love with me.”
― Hank Moody

“The groom should not see you in the dress just before the wedding, that’s bad luck. You know what’s worst luck? Is getting married, itself. I’ve read studies. It’s like 2 out of 3 of those end in divorce, sometimes more. 3 out of 2, some.”
― Hank Moody

“Another interest I have pursued is the opposite sex - the females, the ladies - and not to brag but let's just say I've had a little more success than I've had with the food service industry. Good in the sack, or so I've been told. Seriously - I can get references - although maybe not my last girlfriend, who for reasons that that are still unclear stabbed me with a knife.”
― Hank Moody, God Hates Us All

“Smell you later.”
― Hank Moody

“I can’t teach you how to write, and anybody who says they can is full of shit.”
― Hank Moody

“Maybe, you never know. I’ve always been quite the self-saboteur.”
― Hank Moody

“Oh, I always encourage women to come. It does not always happen, but I like to think that I’m at least encouraging.”
― Hank Moody

“Once upon a time, I wrote a book. People seemed to dig it, so I wrote another and one after that. That’s when Hollywood came knocking at my back door. As soon as I cashed that check, I wrapped my lips around the mighty erection that is the film industry and sucked hard, just like a good whore should. Unfortunately, I had to be taught not to orphan the balls.”
― Hank Moody

“Don’t worry, your prayers have been answered. I’m leaving.”
― Hank Moody