Gail Carriger > Quotes

“I suspect it may be like the difference between a drinker and an alcoholic; the one merely reads books, the other needs books to make it through the day."

(Interview with The Booklovers blog, September 2010)”
― Gail Carriger

“How ghastly for her, people actually thinking, with their brains, and right next door. Oh, the travesty of it all.”
― Gail Carriger, Soulless

“A vampire, like a lady, never reveals his true age.”
― Gail Carriger, Soulless

“I never gossip. I observe. And then relay my observations to practically everyone.”
― Gail Carriger, Timeless

“My dearest girl,' said the vampire finally, examining Lord Maccon with an exhausted but appreciative eye, 'such a banquet. Never been one to favor werewolves myself, but he is very well equipped, now, is he not?'

Miss Tarabotti gave him an arch look. 'My goodies,' she warned.

Humans,' chuckled the vampire, 'so possessive.”
― Gail Carriger, Soulless

“It's no good choosing your first husband from a school for evil geniuses. Much too difficult to kill.”
― Gail Carriger, Etiquette & Espionage

“Cats were not, in her experience, an animal with much soul. Prosaic, practical little creatures as a general rule. It would suit her very well to be thought catlike.”
― Gail Carriger, Soulless

“You are about as covert as a sledgehammer.”
― Gail Carriger, Soulless

“Steampunk is...the love child of Hot Topic and a BBC costume drama”
― Gail Carriger

“Miss Tarabotti was not one of life's milk-water misses--in fact, quite the opposite. Many a gentleman had likened his first meeting with her to downing a very strong cognac when one was expecting to imbibe fruit juice--that is to say, startling and apt to leave one with a distinct burning sensation.”
― Gail Carriger, Soulless

“Well, my love,” said Alexia with prodigious daring to Lord Maccon, “shall we?” The earl started to move forward and then stopped abruptly and looked down at her, not moving at all. “Am I?”

“Are you what?” She peeked up at him through her tangled hair, pretending confusion. There was no possible way she was going to make this easy for him.

“Your love?”

“Well, you are a werewolf, Scottish, naked, and covered in blood, and I am still holding your hand.”

He sighed in evident relief. “Good. That is settled, then.”
― Gail Carriger , Soulless

“I have died and gone to the land of bad novels.”
― Gail Carriger, Blameless

“Lord Maccon was built like a brick outhouse, with opinions twice as unmoving and often equally full of crap.”
― Gail Carriger, Blameless

“He is clearly bookish. I did not follow a single word of their conversation at dinner last night, not one jot of it. He must be bookish.”
― Gail Carriger, Soulless

“She filed the image away as an excellent and insulting question to ask the earl at an utterly inappropriate future moment.”
― Gail Carriger, Soulless

“I mean to say, really, I am near to developing a neurosis - is there anyone around who doesn't want to study or kill me?"
Floote raised a tentative hand.
"Ah, yes, thank you, Floote."
"There is also Mrs Tunstell, madam," he offered hopefully, is if Ivy were some kind of consolation prize.
"I notice you don't mention my fair-weather husband."
"I suspect, at this moment, madam, he probably wants to kill you."
Alexia couldn't help smiling. "Good point.”
― Gail Carriger, Blameless

“Ivy waved the wet handkerchief, as much as to say, words cannot possibly articulate my profound distress. Then, because Ivy never settled for meaningful gestures when verbal embellishments could compound the effect, she said, "Words cannot possibly articulate my profound distress.”
― Gail Carriger, Changeless

“She moved with such purpose it was as though she walked with exclamation marks.”
― Gail Carriger, Changeless

“I kissed her," he explained, aggrieved.

"Mmm, yes, I had the dubious pleasure of witnessing that, ah-hem, overly public occurrence." Lyall sharpened his pen nib, using a small copper blade that ejected from the end of his glassicals.

"Well! Why hasn't she done anything about it?" the Alpha wanted to know.

"You mean like whack you upside the noggin with that deadly parasol of hers? I would be cautious in that area if I were you.”
― Gail Carriger, Soulless

“Alexia figured, delightedly, that this meant he did, in fact, tend to traipse around his private apartments in the altogether. Marriage was becoming more and more of an attractive prospect.”
― Gail Carriger, Soulless

“The vampire's eyes were open, and he was staring at her intently. It was as though he were trying to speak to her with simply the power of a glare.
Alexia did not speak glare-ish.”
― Gail Carriger, Soulless

“The ill-informed masses included her own family among their ranks, a family that specialized in being both inconvenient and asinine.”
― Gail Carriger, Soulless

“Classic author moment, "Oh dear, did I kill that character or not?”
― Gail Carriger

“Highland werewolves had a reputation for doing atrocious and highly unwarranted *things*, like wearing smoking jackets to the dinner table.”
― Gail Carriger, Soulless

“I may be a werewolf and Scottish, but despite what you may have read about both, we are not cads!”
― Gail Carriger, Soulless

“You do realise modern social mores exist for a reason?"
"I was hungry, allowances should be made.”
― Gail Carriger, Soulless

“Stop playing verbal games with me, madam, or I shall go out into that ballroom, find your mother, and bring her here”
― Gail Carriger, Soulless

“[She] lost her patience, a thing she was all too prone to misplacing.”
― Gail Carriger, Heartless

“These feelings you engender in me, my lord, are most indelicate. You should stop causing them immediately.”
― Gail Carriger, Soulless

“He ... boasted an unassuming mustache, which was perched atop his upper lip cautiously, as though it were slightly embarrassed to be there and would like to slide away and become a sideburn or something more fashionable.”
― Gail Carriger, Etiquette & Espionage